Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she is legally blind

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How do you stop your child from picking his nose? Cut his hands off

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A man goes to the doctor. The doctor says: both your legs are broken in 10 places, you will never walk again.

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How do Helen keller's parents punish her? They sternly reprimand her for her misdeeds.

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why did the bear fall out of the tree? He died. Why did the raccoon fall out of the tree? He was stapled to the bear.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To see if he can make before the car hits him.

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Why did the Mexican jump the fence? Because he didn't feel like walking around the house to the side where the gate was to get out of the backyard

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Why did the girl scream for help? She was being raped.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Slavery.

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-It ain't over till the fat lady sings -she just did -oh, I guess it's over then -k

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What hurts more than a papercut? A chainsaw between your legs.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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A jew walk's into a bar. But actually it was a Gas chamber.

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A man in a wheelchair walked into a bar. No he didn't.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Cuz "Somebody left the gate open"

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust

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'l give you a nickle to tickle my pickle i'l give you a dime to take you time

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Yo momma is so ugly, that your father can no longer stand her. They are getting divorced.

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What's the best part about the school burning down? All the children trapped inside never had to grow up

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A man comes home after a long days work. It is late at night and he gets in bed with his wife who is already asleep. Later that night he gets up for a glass of water and returns to the bed room to see that his wife doesn't appear to be breathing and calls 911. He then realizes that this isn't his house and he leaves.

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What is the difference between baseball and the holocaust? One is a fun sporting event…. The other is baseball.

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Whats the difference between a quarter and a penny? 24 cents.

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Two pies where sitting in a oven when one of the pies says: God damn it's hot in here. The other pie screams out loud: HOLY SHIT A TALKING PIE!

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Two cows in a field one says Moo the other says, Moo

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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