oh, you have a baby on board? I'll just drive into the the car next to you...

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When life throws knives at you, run away.

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What's sad about a mexican man dying in a car crash? He had a family that loved and cared for him.

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How do you make a suicide jumper not jump? Shoot him instead.

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Roses are Red Violets are Purple But nothing rhymes with purple.

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Why was the comedian so funny? Because that's his job, and if he wasn't funny he would have to become a hobo.

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What's the difference between a mac and a pc? Well haven't you seen the commercials.

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I have a riddle. What's black and white and red all over? Nothing. That's impossible.

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I went to work today....

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Why did the black man approach a small white girl in the alley? He was knew in town and needed directions

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I couldn't decide whether to buy a pepperoni or a meat feast pizza? So i got neither and my two year old son died of starvation.

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Me: What postion in baseball does a cat play? You: I don't know? What? Me: I don't know i haven't eaten that part yet.

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Hi

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a man walks into a bar.... his? drinking problem is seriously affecting his family

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If you throw a red stone in a blue lake what does it become? Simply a wet stone.

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Q. What is the difference between an ass kisser and a brown noser? A. Depth Perception.

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Have you ever had Ethiopian food?? Neither have they...

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Q: Why did Susan fall off the swings? A: She had no arms Q: Why did no one help her up? A: She had no friends Q: why was she at the play ground? A: Her parents were fighting again Knock Knock Who's there? Not Susan

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What did the cat say to the hamster? Meow

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three men walked into a bar, two walked out... One walked into a metal pole and died

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What's short and weak and has no life..........a Jordan pederson!

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Don't hate the cosplayer hate the... Actually, I lied, hate the cosplayer.

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A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

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How do you make a plumber mad? You tell him that his princess is in another castle about a thousand times over 25 years.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops