Why did Suzie fall of the swing? The chain broke.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what's the difference between a lion and an ostrich? they are both birds, a part from the lion

thumb_up thumb_down -27

How do you sneak Jews across the border? In an ashtray.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Roses are red Violets are... The poem was never finished due to the fact that the reader had narcolepsy and promptly fell asleep.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the guy crash? He was texting.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

You can pick your nose, and you can pick your friends nose. But you can't rob a bank. That's a felony.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did Raymond say when josh ate him? Nothing because Raymond was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's worse than a worm in your apple? Thats a matter of opinion

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why was 6 afraid of 7? because 7 was black

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why does clive keep getting crunk? because no girl satisfies him as much as geros

thumb_up thumb_down -27

A boy and his father are in a car crash. The father dies and the son is transported to the nearest hospital. Once there, a surgeon is brought in to operate on the boy. The surgeon steps back and says "I can't operate on this boy, I haven't had enough training for such a situation." The hospital calls in another surgeon and they are more qualified for the event. Then the surgeon wakes up and realizes the boy is in critical condition. There is blood drenching his shirt and there is only seconds to operate. Suddenly, the boy wakes up and realizes he has just survived a car crash. Suddenly Leonardo DeCaprio enters with a girl. The world turns on its side and they all wake up to find them selves a victim of Inception. Then the caterpillar wakes up and realizes it has immense mental capacity, even above those of an above-average human. Then I woke up and realized I lost my job. MLIA.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Bigfoot, Santa, a dumb blonde, and a smart blonde all jump off of a cliff. They all reach terminal velocity and at impact at the same time. However, no one really cares.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Q: Why did the Little girl fall off the swing set? A: She was Shot in the face.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Sarah Palin.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

why did the guy throw his clock out the window? because he wanted to see a clock fall out the window

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What do you call people who play dance dance revolution? Dancers

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -27

what do you call a man without an umbrella? wet

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Christanity One Womans Excuse of Not Having an Affair Got Totaly Out of Hand

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Whats green and has wheels? Grass...i lied about the wheels

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Why did the cookie go to the doctor, beause he was feeling really crumby...becuase he has testicular cancer

thumb_up thumb_down -27

If you have a dinosaur, how many bicycles do you need to do your homework? Yes, because chewing gums would ask if Greg can go to the handball match.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

What's worse than getting rejected by your date? Finding out she gave you a social disease. Namely AIDS.

thumb_up thumb_down -27

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops