- Anti Joke

What do you do if a black man throws a gernade at you? You take the pin out, and throw it back.

Roses are red, Metal is gray, Justin Beiber, is very gay

Why was the black man in Jail? He works there as a correctional officer.

Knock Knock? Who's There? The Gestapo.

Why did the black kid pass the exam? Because he studied.

I've got a tip for the ladies. Or if you like I can put the whole thing

Oh because you have Lou Gehrigs Disease

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why didn't paul ride the horse? he was busy

What's moist wet and I put my finger in it? My nose.

Why didn't the pregnant, pro-choice woman have an abortion? It was a planned pregnancy.

Why did the pedophile go to the park? He lost his dog.

A donkey looks at a goat. The goat walks away.

What did one dog say to the other dog? Bark.

How many rats does it take to screw in a light bulb? Two. But they have to be really small.

Why did annie fall off the swing? Because she had no arms! Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Annie!

What happened to the famous musician when he overdosed? He overdosed.

A panda walks into a restaurant, sits down and orders a sandwich. After he finishes eating the sandwich, the panda pulls out a gun and shoots the waiter, and then stands up to go. "Hey!" shouts the manager. "Where are you going? You just shot my waiter and you didn't pay for your sandwich!" The panda yells back at the manager, "Hey man, I am a PANDA! Look it up!" The manager's heart skipped a beat, and he locked himself inside his office, trembling with fear and confusion. Yes, it was plausible that a beast such as this could point to a random entry on the menu, and it was physically possible for it to pull the trigger of the gun (and, at such close proximity to the waiter, it would be pretty hard to miss him), but it was shocking and altogether disturbing to hear such an animal speak in human language, much less vernacular English.

Coach: Hey, you missed the team meeting today, but I wanted to let you know we've had a number of changes to the lineup. Player: Really? Who's on first? Coach: That's right. A man with the unlikely name of Mr. Who is on first. We also have Mr. What on second, and Mr. I Don't Know is on third. The rest of the team is the same. Player: Oh. People have weird names now. But I'm sure they're great guys. Thanks for explaining that. Coach: Any time. Don't mention it.

How do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? You don't, the giraffe is a savanah animals and there is no physical way for a giraffe to fit in a refridgerator.

How many sumo wrestlers does it take to lift a huge rock? The point of lifting a rock just to lift a rock is stupid, so why would you get 3 sumo wrestlers to come out and waste their time.

what didn't I do when making this joke? Read and agree to the terms of service.

Person 1: Ask me if i'm a tree. Person 2: Are you a tree? Person 1: No.

What's pink fluff? Pink fluff. What's blue fluff? Pink fluff holding it's breath. What's red fluff? Angry pink fluff. Ask me if I'm a truck. Are you a tr-- No. What's green and has wheels? Grass. I was just lying about the wheels. What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding half a worm in your apple, 'cause the other half's in your mouth. What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? Angry pink fluff. What's worse than angry pink fluff? The holocaust. That's not funny. Stop laughing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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