"Knock, knock." "You don't have to say that. The door's open, come on in."

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What is yellow, has wheels, and lays on it's back? A school bus after a traffic accident

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What's red and round? A red and round solid.

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there was a little girl walking through a park. then she was kidnapped and most likely raped and sold to a foreign country.

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why did the chicken cross the road? becuase he wanted to walk and the road was the only available place to do so

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There are 2 kinds of people in this world... 1.Those who need closure.

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What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

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Why didn't the 12-year old boy eat his birthday cake? He has diabetes and would likely die from the increased spike in insulin.

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Dear Rubix Cube, DONE!! Sincerely, Colorblind

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how do you stop a black man from drowning take your foot off his head

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There were two men 1 says "hey stupid" and the other man says "Yeah"

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Knock Knock Whos there? Jason Oh, ok come in.

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What did the strawberry say to the grape? Nothing, inanimate objects can't use verbal communication.

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a man walks into a bar, what does he say answer: oww..

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A month after the nuclear bombing of Hiroshima, a typhoon hit the city killing another 2,000 people.

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What's worse than biting into an apple and finding a worm? Starving.

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A Hispanic, Jew and black man walk into a bar. The bartender tells them to get out because he's closed.

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Why did the blonde get fired from the M&M Factory Because she repeatedly wrote Ws

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What's the difference between a Toyota Camry and 20 dead babies? I don't have 20 dead babies in my garage.

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Uh no, yogurt as in the bacteria that they add to milk in order to make the finished product yogurt. You see, while the effect is seen in twins (for example if one twin gets raped, the other gets a fucking sore ass) Sorry, I am still under trance here myself, you get out of it, I am gonna have some fun, go splash some water on your face. I mean people go like "woah that is impossible it only happens in rare cases and so on right?" Fun stuff: Yogurt, you can seal yogurt in a steel container miles away after separating its culture (basically having a colony living together and then moving them away from each other as in 30000 kilometers and sealing them in soundproof safe`s and whatnot. Feed one half of the yogurt, and the other one far far away begins munching into thin air, now keep the food close to the yogurt, and the bacteria will begin "begging for it" (as in when baby chicks notice the parent has arrived with food), and so will the culture of yogurt sealed in a safe 30000 miles away. Why? Living in similar states, brings a natural connection, we are attracted to similarities, and as far as the human knowledge of the LAW of attraction goes, distance is not a factor, look it up, or just believe me.

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Why does history repeat itself? Because no one listened to it the first time.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: That depends how hard you throw them... Q: Whats worse than 10 babies nailed to 1 tree? A: 1 baby nailed to 10 trees...

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Why did the gay guy come out of the closet? He finally found the shirt he was looking for

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what would happen if you took all the veins out of your body and laid them out tip to tip? you die

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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