Edward Smith had started telling a long rambling joke when William McMaster Murdoch cut him off with "I don't like where this is headed".

thumb_up thumb_down +5

How come the bartender didnt let the black guys in the bar Because the bar was closed.noone was aloud in the bar

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Whats better than Anti-jokes? Mtiscape.com

thumb_up thumb_down +5

I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What happened when the blonde girl threw a grenade? The enemy pulled the pin and threw it back

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What's Green and flies? Super Grapes cousin Super Grape

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What is computers and smells like thin and fragile? dyslexic nipples.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

The first cow: are you worried about mad cow disease? the second cow: no, im a helicopter

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Your dad isn't gay...but his boyfriend..HES REALLY GAY!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why did Susie fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie!

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

thumb_up thumb_down +5

when placing the bolt in the side of the metal rememb............ shit wrong book ........................................................................

thumb_up thumb_down +5

how doyou wake up lady gaga youu poke er face

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

What do you call a skeleton in a closet? The hide-and-seek champion.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A plane crashes in a polish cemetery the authorities have found 2000 bodies

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Q: What did the doctor say to the man with terminal cancer? A: You have terminal cancer.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

A: What is faster than a speeding bullet? B: Light

thumb_up thumb_down +5

knock knock who's there the police you're under arrest for the kidnapping, and murder of 12 girls you have the right to remain silent anything you say or do can and will be used against you in the court of law

thumb_up thumb_down +5

Why couldn't Roger become an astronaut? Because Roger's a toaster.

thumb_up thumb_down +5

why did the tortoise cross the road? it does not matter, it got hit by a vehicle and died on impact.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Why did the chicken cross the road. ... It didn't.

thumb_up thumb_down +3

walk into your friend’s house and say “what’s up with the dead guy out front?” (you have to murder a person for this joke to work)

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Q: What's worse than stepping a LEGO in the middle of the night? A: A landmine

thumb_up thumb_down +3

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops