A: Knock Knock B: (No Reply) Nobody is home and the man trying to get in will come back later and try again.

What do you call a shark on land A dead shark

A man walks into a bar and probably sustains serious head injuries and possibly a concussion as most bars are usually made out of solid metals such as iron or steel and is therefore not permitted by his doctor to engage in sports or other rigorous activities for an allotted period of time depending on the degree of his injury.

A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says "why the long face?' The horse says "I was just diagnosed with testicular cancer."

Kindness is what makes the world go round..... and chocolate.

How do you make a baby cry? Throw a brick at its face!

What's more dangerous, a big rock or a small one? It doesn't matter. You can blame my mom for having me.

knock knock whos there? yo mama yo mama who? yo mamas mama!!

What did the Turkey say on Thanksgiving? Gobble gobble.

You know what's gay?? Lesbians

how do you stop a gang of black people from raping a white woman? throw a basketball

YOUR MOMMA IS SO FAT WHEN SHE JUMPED FOR JOY........she didn't get stuck because there's nothing to get stuck in.

What did the lighthouse say to the tree? Nothing because they are both unatimate objects and cannot speak

whats the difference between a phone and Helen Keller? you listen to the phone and you smash Helen Keller on the head with a spiked baseball bat

Yogurt? You are joking right? I am having yogurt right now, do you like see trough me or something? I mean I have been told people can do that but no way!

KNOCK KNOCK. WHO'S THERE? BOO. OH, HEY. COME IN. ....

Nope, I mean you can try, but my phone is busted and the code on the chip my galpal here managed to finally get into the cell, has sixteen digits so damn small that none of us can read it,

What do you call a black guy eating fried chicken -A black guy being black

why did the walrus sex with the jew because 911 created a sexual falafel

How do you make a little girl cry twice? You rub your bloody penis on her teddy bear.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I'm gonna screw you and you don't have a clue !

what is the biggest lie in the whole world? -please drink responsibly

What do you call a black man with a club? Tiger woods.

Why are birds purple? because it fits the sky why are bats purple? bats aren't purple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...