What did the guy say before he learned how to Dougie? Teach me how to Dougie

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Kid: Mom I'm gonna dig a hole all the way to China! Mom: That's sweet but it's impossible dear. You'll get to tired after awhile to go any farther. Also, by any chance you did dig really deep, you would melt and die if you got the the center because the magma will kill you when you get to it. Alright son? Kid: What?

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Q: Whats Long, Black and Smells? A: Sh*t

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so a baby seal walks into a club, the bouner immedietly kicks the seal out because it is too young to be in a club and also.....itsa seal

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How many Mexicans does it take to cross the border? Don't answer, just think and laugh.

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Two blondes walks into a tavern, which is kind of funny, since the second one should have seen it.

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I told my friend one of these anti-jokes, he took it seriously and beat my head with a bat.

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I flipped through the Yellow Pages, made a few calls, and found the Chinese man I was looking for.

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Your mumma's so ugly. Period.

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What did Katniss say to her sister? hi

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What did the shit covered people licking each others scrotums call themselves? The Aristocrats

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A Jew walks on his way to work. He does not notice the quarter lying on the sidewalk and did not care for the dollar lying on the other side of the road.

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Q:If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is here to hear it, will it make a noise A:That Philosopher probably had a lot of herbal tea in the morning

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whos on the right track? lady gaga

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Whats blind and deaf? Hellen Keller.

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Q:what's worse than eating outdated raviolis? A:terminal cancer.

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Get up Look in the mirror

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knock knock whos there knock knock whos there knock knock whos there poor billy didnt know that the knocking was just a tree branch and he stayed asking the same question for 21 years

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A man was driving down the road and was swerving, a cop stops him and asks him to walk in a straight line, believing him to be drunk. The man replies "I can't, I've been blind since I was a child."

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being brutally murdered as you are watching your guts spilling out of your body

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What's yellow and smells like cheese? Cheese.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have alziemers banana cookie!

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If black guys really have big packages, why are there standards so low, they prefer fat girls? I don't know, but prejudice and racism is wrong dickhead.

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What is worse than throwing your baby in the river? Letting Moses out of Egypt

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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