A polar bear walks into a bar, sits down, and says, "Can I have a.........................beer?" The bartender asks, "Why the large pause?" The bear responds, "I have a speech impediment"

What happened to the teenager who was raped and murdered? Who knows? They never found the body.

There is a newly wed couple, a biker and his biker lady friends. The newly wed man says to his wife, "Pass the honey, honey". One of the biker chicks looks over. Five minutes later the man says to his wife, "Pass the sugar, sugar". They biker chick looks back at them and then asks the biker man, "Why don't you treat us like that?" " You know your right. Pass the bacon... lovely". And from that day on the bikers lived in peace and harmony.

Chuck Norris walks up to a baby and punches it in the face He walks away and laughs

Roses are red Violets are blue I want to have sex But no one else wants to

okay so three men are in a plane ( this is the type of plane you can open the windows) so the stewardess goes up to the first man he asks for a gun she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window he confused but he does it anyways the stewardess goes to the second man he asks for a beer she agrees but he has to throw it out the window hes confused but he does it anyways the stewardess walks up the the third man he asks for a pack of C4 she agrees but hes gotta throw it out the window without hesitation he gets it and throws it out the window. so they land and the first man sees a women crieing i was walking down the street and got hit in the head by a gun and arested for being armed the second man sees a hobo cheering loudly hes says he was sleeping in the ally and it started raining budlight the third man shes a women hysterically laughing she says i was going to work and spilled my coffe then my house blew up!

you suck

Why did Jerald heat up pizza? Because he was hungry.

Your mom's so fat that she is going to contract heart disease by age 30.

What happened to the soldier who go shot while fighting terrorists in the middle east? He died and had a proper funeral back in the town/city that he was born in.

Whats similar about an elephant and a plum? Theyre both gray, except for the plum

Why did the spy cross the road? To get to the other hide.

Your're racist.

What do you call a green blur in the sky? Super pickle?

Basically

Hey can you turn Tmartn upI can't hear him

Q: Wanna hear a joke? A: the WNBA

Pacient: Doctor Doctor i think im becoming a vegetable... because of my heriditory bone marrow mutation

Quaint? Oh yeah? YOU ARE QUAINT! No seriously, whats that word all about.

why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

Knock Knock. Whose there? Fed-Ex, here's your new brother.

When geese migrate, why is one side of the V longer than the other? There are more birds on that side.

A deaf man is listening to the radio. Think about it.

Q. Why did the dinosaur cross the road? A. Because chickens hadn't evolved yet.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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