How do you scare off a ghost? Tell him your ready for a commitment.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How many Jews do you have to kill in order to make a museum? 6 Million.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was john's balls itchy? Because he recently gained a severe infestation of pubic lice.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

A man is playing pacman, on his last life, and is cornered. He inserts another coin in the slot.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

How do you keep black people from hanging around in your front yard? Hang them in the back..

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What did they call the dude who was stuck on a deserted island? A: Incontinent.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why was the man crying? He has aids.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Q: What did the newborn dumpster baby say to the raccoon? A: Nothing. Newborn babies cannot talk.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What's big and long? My dick.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the kitten cross the road? Because its owners abandoned it.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What do you say to a man who just gave you a million dollars. thank you

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Whats worse than finding 2 worms in your apple? 2 Holocausts.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

justin bieber over spongebob *snicker*

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the man say to the butterfly? To the butterfly? Nothing. He was probably talking to himself.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What walks on it's hands My uncle

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Knock-Knock Whos there? You You who? Yoohoo! is anybody home?!! Well obviously or i wouldn't have talked to you. Idiots these days!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

what do black and white people have in common? when they dont wear sunscreen, they get sunburnt, except for black people.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why do midgets wear condoms? To avoid unwanted pregnancies and sexually transmitted diseases.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the cow fall Cause a fat kid pushed him over

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the ocean say the other ocean? Nothing, bodies of water are incapable of speech.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

one day a hippy and a nun wer on a bus, the hippy asks, Will you have sex with me? the none replies, heck no im a nun. the nun gets off the bus and the hippy follows. the bus driver stops him and says, i know how you can have sex with her, she goes to the cemitary at 9:00 every night, dress us as jesus and command her to have sex with you. okay thanks! the hippy says. that night the hippy dress's up as jesus finds the nun and says " i am jesus and i command you to have sex with me. The nun says okay but only A n a l because im a nun! and they get to it, when there done the hippy takes off his mask and says haha im the hippy, the nun takes off her mask and says haha im the bus driver!! like if you get it :)

thumb_up thumb_down -14

What did the man say when he put his genitals in a blender? Argggghhh!

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was heading to the funeral house to mourn his dead family.

thumb_up thumb_down -14

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops