What did the farmer say when he couldnt find his tractor? "Wheres my tractor?"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Knock Knock. There was no answer.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Whats red and black and has 8 legs? 4 dead african babies.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What has four eyes but can't see? A: A blind guy with glasses

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A man walks into a bar and the bartender asks "what will you have". The man says "Friendship" and bursts out crying. At this point he is making a scene and security will have too be called.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What do you call a cow that's not cooked? A cow

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why was the deer afraid of the hunter because the smell of toasters

thumb_up thumb_down -2

An elephant stomped on a mouse. What did the mouse say? Nothing, the mouse was incapable of speech due to the elephants actions.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why would a man mistake a watermelon for AK-47? i dont know. The man probably has mental issues.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

a chicken and a rooster walk into a bar. and then walk out because a bar is no place for a chicken and a rooster.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Rebecca Black sings a song.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the chicken cross the road? His wife and children had just been struck by a moving vehicle traveling at approximately 45 miles per hour trying to cross the same road. He ran across the road to comfort his dying wife and two children as they took their final breaths. The chicken was also not really a chicken but a middle-aged man who had recently been laid off his job and diagnosed wiuth an incureable disease.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

what is worse than the holocaust. interracial relationship, cough..... oli

thumb_up thumb_down -2

roses are red violet is blue why rik go to the hospital ? cause he eat glue.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What's worse than ten babies stapled to one tree? A: One baby stapled to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A woman walks out of the kitchen.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Two cows are standing in a field. One says to the other, 'Have you heard about this mad cow disease?' and the other says 'Good thing we're penguins.'

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the 15 year old commit suicide? Because his parents and 3 sisters died in a car accident and he went to live with his uncle, who constantly raped him.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did the girl fall out of the swing? She had no arms.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

All these jokes are so much funnier when I read them during class, laughing my ass off and everybody's looking at me like I'm retarded

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What did the millionaire say to the hobo? Hi there.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops