What do you call a man with no arms and no legs in the ocean? Dead.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Reminding you of your religion. The army led by God attacked their foes at the mountains, yet had to flee because the enemy had plated steel wagons. Moral: Either God cant beat steel, or he was not there at all, its your call gents, because reading Ave Maria 50 times each time you sin, without reading the whole thing, does not even make you a Christian you FUCK (yes I can curse, you cannot)

thumb_up thumb_down -7

My friend came in the barber's shop and asked me to cut his hair for him, i always have rude banter with him and i made a joke about his big bate nose. He acused me of calling him Jewish and threatened to sue me. This is how i found out that he was a white supremisist.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

butt bananan appe aeriugbahrei bviaAETRGNARJEOGBAEROUGBAREOGABINGBIFDUVHR9EH VARVBNF V BAR GABNER UGH 8U78 6 78 C 877 86IHUR T HUGU GHG HU GHUG ERHU; BGIU AHUB HOAU AOH;UGG RJHI NJB NBJ NAJF BNJ NJ IJ BB B NNB UB OH UAERFNSKALDF AHUAWRETFBSUGFHAUNVCHCIWERCFO4F[U940RU320RY4 33 4TVNO34INRT4`UR1C34BT4567=95084651898549+0451467016849=80 .97.8

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why are black people so good at basketball? Because they work hard at it

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How do you get a black man out of his house? you ring the doorbell.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what taste like an apple, looks like an apple, but isnt an apple? an apple.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

News of the day - David gives back 2 pounds to someone. The police, as he stole from a old nana to pay for a toothbrush

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man walks into a psychiatrists office with a banana in his ear. The psychiatrist says, why do you have that banana in your ear? The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist says, "I said, 'Why do you have that banana in your ear?" The man says, "What?" The psychiatrist shouts, "I SAID, WHY DO YOU HAVE THAT BANANA IN YOUR EAR?" The man says, "Sorry, I can't hear you, I'm deaf."

thumb_up thumb_down -7

A man with a barbie doll walks into a bar. He goes up to the bartender and says "I bet you $100 that I can turn this barbie doll into a beautiful lady". The bartender laughs and says "Okay." The man takes out a brush and begins brushing the doll's hair. Seconds later the man has a seizure and falls to floor a dies. It turns out he was a drug addict and had a fatal over dose. The bartender never got his $100.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Walnut

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the man punch NUGE in the face? Because he got angry that NUGE was being such a BA person and he was jealous of NUGE'S style and he just got dumped by his ugly as poop mom which was eating Anti Chicken.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your moma's so fat, she has a considerable list of medical health problems, and she is very miserable.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why couldn't Jesus get a driver's license? Because automobiles did not exist 2000 years ago.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

what do you call someone with one arm? Handicapped.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Knock knock. Who's there? Your mom. Your mom who? Its your mom now open the danm door!

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Zombie kill and eat a man? Because it was hungry.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How did Chris die? Bush-fire

thumb_up thumb_down -7

How can you tell if a dog is under your chair? Look under your chair

thumb_up thumb_down -7

What do you call a bird with a broken wing? A bird with a broken wing.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

how many milkshakes does it take to bring all the boys to the yard?

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Your moma is so fat, that Jabba the Hutt says: "Damn!!!"

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Why did the Harry Potter fan cry in school? She ran out of tampons.

thumb_up thumb_down -7

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops