What do you call the birth of George Lucas? Terrible, abdominal pain for his mother.

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A white player in the NBA. Wait...

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What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

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How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

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What do you call a fridge? A Fridge

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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whats funny? this joke. just kidding. your face.

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Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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Roses are blue Violets are buckets this poem makes no sense Washing machines

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roses are red violets are blue i bribed a hobo to eat my poopoo

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what do all elephants have in common? they are all monkeys

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Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

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What did the old Hispanic man say to the young black woman in the Laundromat? I don't know cause I goofed in school and didn't pay attention in spanish class.

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Every human being has some kind of penis <3

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Yo Momma So Fat!

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whats better than nailing a baby to a wall? Ripping it off the wall.

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Your mother is so fat that when she jumps into a pool, she displaces a proportionately larger amount of water than people with normal body mass indexes or BMI

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Q. What do you call a dog thats deaf? A. A horribly abused domesticated animal that needs a kinder owner.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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