A: Why are black people so good at sports? B: Practice and determination.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I got Alzheimer's! ...... Who the hell are you?

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Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

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Actual jokes are now obsolete.

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How much does a polar bear weigh? It depends, but most weigh around 775 to 1,200 pounds.

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If Jimmy had 5 apples and his brother had 5 apples then their father would have been married to their mother before they were born.

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Your mom is so poor; she doesn't have a job.

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How do you treat someone that is feels like a total failure? Treatment: Okay, draw a square on the board over there, but in order to succeed, you must fail at it. Patient one: Oh, I drew a cicrle :( Patient two: I drew a square :( Congratulations one you succeeded at failing! Now get outta here. Congratulations patient two, you succeeded at the given task, bye bye.

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Ask me if I'm on a horse. Are you on a horse? Yes, are you on a horse? No. Oh...

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How many immature teenagers does it take to screw in a light bulb? Your Mum.

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What did the blind quadriplegic get for Christmas? Cancer.

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What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

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A teenager decides to stay home instead of go to college. His parents are fine with his choice since he is mentally ill.

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Why did sally fall off the swings? She didn't have any arms. Knock Knock, Who's there? Not Sally, she doesn't have any arms.

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Why didn't the man buy the sportscar? He couldn't drive stick

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Duck: got any grapes? Lemonade Seller: no the duck waddeld away and never came back for the guy has no grapes

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What did the little girl say after her dad hit her? Nothing. She was a month old and died instantly.

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's dad owned a shot gun.

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Wanna hear a joke? Ruddell had sex.

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What is the best Anti-Joke ever? Your Mom. :(

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why did the boys run from Michael Jackson? because they thought he was a ghost

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because you suck your own dick.

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sally

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops