whats funny? this joke. just kidding. your face.

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What glows in the dark and is really annoying? A glow in the dark chimpanzee

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Q: What did the black man say to the sheriff? A: Good day, officer

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because no cars were coming.

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What did the orphan boy get for Christmas? Exactly what he had asked for because UNICEF do a wonderful job.

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A man is walking down the street in Chicago. A man in a car pulls up next to him and asks him, "Excuse me sir, how do I get to Carnegie Hall?", at which the man on the street said, "Go straight here, turn onto Birch, follow that to the second stop light, then turn left on Main, big complex, can't miss it." "Thank you!"

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What would happen if you put avocando, pineapple, sardines, peanut butter, brussel sprouts and milk into a blender and drank it. most probabley salmonala poisoning because the sardines were off.

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Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium Sodium BATMAN! Oh cemetery jokes

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What happens to a fish with no fin on the right side? It repeatedly swims in circle.

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What kind of doctors would you call A 30 year old chimpanzee? I would say "Plastic surgeon" but that would be unscrupulous to the chimpanzees because the tearing off or "lifting" of the owners face is because they are just animals. And should have never been kept in captivity that long anyways.

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A deaf man walks into a bar. Someone yells, "FIRE!" and everyone evacuates. The deaf man does not hear him and dies horribly.

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Whats green? Mountain Dew.

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what would abraham lincoln do if he were alive today? scream and try to open his coffin.

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Q. Why did the chicken cross the road? A. To get to the other side.

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Whats less comfortable than a metal bench? The trunk of a car when you're being abducted.

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What's a ghost's favorite color? Usually whatever their favorite color was in life.

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Yo Momma So Fat!

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

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Every human being has some kind of penis <3

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A man drinks a java while using Java His java was hot, making him spill on his laptop Blue screen of death

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Did you hear about my new Muslim friend? Hes the bomb!

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Yo momma's so ugly. Most people do not enjoy looking at her

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Q) A black man and a white man are playing a basketball game, who will win? A) The one who scores the most points.

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why did the chicken cross the road? to try and stop the rapist from sodomizing his young child but his atempts were futile as the rapist shot him and used his blood as lubricant when he skull-raped his dying wife

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops