Oracle horacle, you big bloated boracle!

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's difficult and tedious to do? Trying to find a joke with 0 thumbs up/down -Sykes

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by jimmy savile.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Man one: Why does the moon look like a face? Man two: I don't know, why? Man one: I don't know either, that's why i asked....

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Relax, anyway I hope its just the not not hypnotic suggestion, it would be really disappointing to to know that you are high on weed, even if it is very relaxing, not that I would know, I tried valium once, it kinda increased that sensation you have tenfold. Anyway, what I meant to say was, would you kindly tell me what size your breasts are? Do you shave down there?

thumb_up thumb_down -29

what is the tastiest veggie? veggies aren't tasty.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

Q: Why does a zebra have stripes? A: Because Sarah Jessica Parker is a horse.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

What's better than sex? I have never had sex and, therefor, do not have adequate knowledge of the experience enough to make a comparison to other experiences. You should ask someone who has had sex.

thumb_up thumb_down -29

so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

I recently found out I have aids just kiddin heres the real joke... I recenly found out that Philidelphia means "City of Brotherly Love" and I said so do people in philly say its always free hug day in Phillipd fun house in philly?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A man walks into the doctor's office and says "I'm not feeling to good doc." and the doctor says "Thats because you have a fatal brain tumor and probably don't have too long to live."

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many turrets patients does it take to screw in a light bulb? Cocksucker!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What did one jobless cancer cell say to the other? Lets go get Jobs.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What's the funniest thing about the holocaust? Nothing it wasn't a joke

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Q:How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? A:Depends on the volume of said tub.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

T-rex: If you're happy and you know it clap your hands, oh...

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

A kid had wild unprotected sex. He didn't get an STD or enpregnate the girl.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

why did the chicken cross the road? I don't care! What are you doing in my house?

thumb_up thumb_down -31

How many blondes does it take to change a light bulb? Well it depends how many of them can figure out the staircase.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

What do you get if you throw a banana at the wall? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Why was the boy crying? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down -31

theres this guy that i REALLY like but today he was putting something in my locker, it was gumbie the little green bendy thing but i didnt want it to be in my locker so i slammed my locker, except the only thing was that his pinky was in the way!!!! oh gosh i felt soooooo bad!!!! turns out he went to the hostpital and got stitches!!!!!!! that made it worse on me!!!!!! he said he was finee but i still cant let that go!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down -31

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops