The Oakland Raiders

How many tacos does it take to feed an angry person? You better tacover it!

Just got cancer: YOLO!! -sad face-

Q: What's the difference between a truck full of bowling balls and a truck full of dead babies? A: You can't unload a truck full of bowling balls with a pitchfork.

why did the cookie go to the doctor? he had to get a physical to be eligible for his school's football tryouts. his mom drove him there but was very careful not to get his hopes up too high since his chances of actually making the team were slim to none based on the fact that he had no arms or legs but only succulent chocolate chips in every bite.

Why are objects in your mirror closer than they appear? Because they are closer than they appear.

Why did the boy dig a hole in the football field? He was blind and his parents were being quite irresponsible....However someone should probably fill in that hole, as that could be a hazard during a football game.

Obesity runs in your family. To bad no one runs in your family.

What smells like smoke, sounds like a pig, and looks like a horse? My mom's boyfriend

Yo mamma is so skinny, she has developed anorexia, a serious eating disorder, which not only affects her, but also the ones that she loves and cares about.

A blonde, redhead, and a brunette are chatting outside a casino. The brunette directs a joke towards the blonde. "What's the difference between cotton candy and pork chops?" The blonde has heard the joke prior to this encounter and correctly completes it with sign language because she is deaf.

I don't have ADHD I just- Hey look a squirrel!

why was Lucy fat? Her BMI was over the recommended average.

I had friends on the Death Star.

Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

pull my finger (farts)

Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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