How many owls can you fit in a bath tub?

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What's bad about four black men in a car going over a cliff? It was my car.

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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Roses are red, violets are blue my neighbor is black he will jump you too

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What did the black man buy at the store? Nothing he has no money

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Why was the guy tired? His titties were too big

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bangers and mash?

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Why did the smoker die at a petrol station? He had lung cancer.

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How do you make a dog say meow? Freeze it and put it through a woodchipper. (MEROWRRRR)

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Why couldn't Matilda walk to school? Because a dog ripped her legs off.

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Why did Helen Keller's dog run away? He didn't, animal control took the dog away from Helen because she could not properly care for the dog.

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Two guys walk into a bar. They are knocked out and rushe to hospital because the bar was metal.

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What does the redhead miss most at a party? Her father. He was in a car accident when she was young.

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What did the orphan kids get for Christmas? Cancer.

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So, I was walking down the street. As i walked past a oak door an entrance to a mental institution, I heard a bored voice going, "eleven, eleven, eleven". My curiosity, like a cat, got better of me and I decided to take a peek through the key hole and see the eleven things being counted. As soon as I had my eye on the key hole, I was poked in the eye by a metal rod. Startled, I feel back to the street. And, sure enough, heard the same bored voice, going, "twelve, twelve, twelve".

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Why did the tourist cross the road? He was sightseeing.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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pull my finger (farts)

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Why did the woman have no boobs? Breast cancer

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I had friends on the Death Star.

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Breaydn Simmons walked into a bar

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Q: How many dwarfs does it take to change a light bulb? A: 1 or 2. One to change the light bulb and maybe another one to guards the staircase for the safety of the first one when the ceiling is too high (Wich happens almost every time because they are dwarfs.)

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What did the chocolate milk say? Yoo-hoo.

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how do you get lady gaga to wake up in the morning? Hit her with a brick

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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