Whats black and can run fast? a panther.... racist

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was dead. Why did the other monkey fall out of the tree? It was taped to the other monkey

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why did the chicken cross the world becuase he had to go in the bathroom

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What do you call a really old black person? Someone's grandfather

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What do you call cheese that isn't yours? Mine.

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Wha'ts the difference between Justin Beiber and a piece of hot muff garbage? Fart triscuits.

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What do you get when you cross Bambi and a ghost? Bamboo

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Mohamed is driving a taxi to the airport at 20mph How many pounds of explosives are strapped to his chest?

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I started a pottery course where the two instructors looked like Demi Moore and Patrick Swayze. The only other student looked like Whooping Goldberg. This teacher to student ratio proved invaluable as I am hoping to make a living as an artist and really appreciated all the extra attention.

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There is more than one way to skin a cat. I used a potato skin peeler.

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So a man walks into a bar and wonders why he walked into the building instead of simply just walking through the door. The man then realized that the building was if fact not a local bar, but instead a bowling alley. He was hallucinogenic and was in serious danger as he approached the candy man in the alley.

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Your mama is so fat but she is also a very kind and friendly person so her weight doesn't bother me at all,

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Wanna hear a joke??... No...... oh ok :(

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What did one dog say to the other dog? Nobody knows as humans are unable to understand the way dogs communicate.

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Why did Johnny throw his money on the floor? Because he was giving it to charity

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There once was a man from Nantucket, With a penis so long he could suck it. He said with a grin, as he wiped off his chin, If my ear was a cunt, that’d be strange.

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you know why Michael J Fox makes the best milkshakes? no... but his milkshakes brings all the boys to the yard

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Why did Suzy fall of the swing? She didn't have arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Suzy.

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You walk into a plane full of Arabs talking about how much they hate America. You arrive at your destination enlightened about the problems in American society.

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What's 2+2? Fish

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What's orange and is a loyalist in the orange order? Caoimhin McCann?

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Little Miss Muffett sat on her tuffet eating her curds and whey along came her food allergies and she died

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Three Arabian men are on a plane, they stand up, and shout BOMB, BOMB, BOMB! All three have Tourettes.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops