A hill billy went fishing

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How did the dinosaur come out of the water? Wet.

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Why didnt timmy go to the party Mom said no

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what do you call a guy that looks exactly like Mario. Frank because thats his name.

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Heard about the dyslexic fellow who sold his soul to Santa? That worked out OK, but Christmas was hell.

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what is differnt about a boyscout and a jew? the boyscout comes back from camp

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what's worse than being chased by a turtle? being chased by an angry turtle

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How did the two friends cross the busy road? They couldn't, because that would be considered jay-walking

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Why did little Susie fall off the cliff? I pushed her.

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Why cant Michael J Fox draw a perfect circle? because he is dying of parkinson's disease.

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A Blonde walks into a bar. She is in an abusive relationship and drinking her pain away.

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A ham sandwich walks into a bar, bartender says "We don't serve food here."

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The lion swallowed his pride.

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your mum

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Up High. *high fives* In The Middle *high fives* Down Low *high fives* In the Grass *high fives* You've been diagnosed with prostate cancer.

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What's the opposite of white? Black. You're racist. You fapped.

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A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

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"hey do you know the date" "58"

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Why would Bill Clinton like Jess so much? Cause he has a vagina, smells like shit, and has cankles.

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What happens if you punch a girl? An equal rights protest.

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Your mom.

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What do you call a muslim in an airport? A muslim going on vacation you racist bastard.

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Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

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Me John Kasich! Me win Ohio primary!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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