What do you do when life throws lemons at you? Take out your lemon shield and retreat deep into your lemon proof bunker.

What smells like pizza and likes to roll? Pizza rolls.

this website even though its hilarious.

What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

You walk into a shopping centre, what wont you see? Madelin McCann.

Why did John suck at sports? He was mentally retarded and had no friends.

Knock Knock. (No answer) Knocker: " I guess the resident of this home isn't home at this hour."

Why did the boy not get picked up from soccer? His mom was in a fatal car accident. His dad simply forgot.

Why did the donkey say "Shit sorry I had no idea" Because the batteries shouted: "Nobody told me about your actions here, sorry for the terrible coding format, I am new"

How do you kill a blond? Stab her repeatedly in her throat

Your mamma's so dumb, we are seriously worried she might hurt herself.

knock knock come in !

hi mom

Why to lawyers wear neckties? It's part of the uniform.

how do you wake up a cat? you break it.

Knock Knock Whos there? Your mom My mom died three years ago, please go away while i cry.

Q:What's the difference ethernet a corvette and a pile of dead baby's? A:I don't have a corvette in my garage

Roses are gay Violets are gayer when you hear girls moaning im the player

Roses are red Tulips are blue Wait, no sorry That's violets.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. I got a baseball bat can i talk to you ?

A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

your mom is so stupid she got raped

Why did the african kid die He was mauled by a tiger in a zoo

How do you make a hormone? Modify bacteria using recombinant DNA technology.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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