An Indian lady is pushing her child down a footpath in a stroller whilst leading her dog. A refridgerator lands on the mother. Why did the Chinese man behind her cry? Because loss of life is a frantic event and having witnessed such an event he was deeply shocked. He was also sad that no dogs were killed. This is because a dog killed his wife in a freak accident and he has held a grudge against the species ever since.

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roses are blue violets are green I am colorblind

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I fantasize about having sex with a moose

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An Irishman walks into a bar he asks for directions, and leaves.

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What do you call it when a blonde jumps off the Empire State Building without a parachute? Suicide.

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A flea walks into a bar. Nobody notices because it is a very small insect

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Me: Hey frank, wanna die? Frank: No, why? Me: (Kills Frank) Frank: Dude why did you kill Frank?

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Whats better than sex? Not dying. Ha

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Two peanuts were walking down the street, one was assaulted, the other was brutally raped.

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What happens when a black man dies in France? A funeral procession.

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Why didnt suzy give mary i high five? because i cut off her hand

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I'm a poet and I didn't even realize I was one

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What did the Doctor say to the patient. You have AIDS The patient took out a machete and stabbed the Doctor. The Doctor died. Two weeks later, the patient died of AIDS.

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How can you tell if a man has an erection? His penis is no longer flaccid

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What's straight and famous. Ryan Secrest I was just kidding about the stright

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Why are there so many jokes about germans on Anti-Joke? Because the Germans epitomize the flavour of anti-jokes perfectly and they have the whole nazi history thing going on which is ripe ground for many an anti-joke

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Q: What did the black man, the white man, the hispanic man, and the english man have in common? A: They all enjoyed broccoli.

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Whats blue and white and red all over? The American flag

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What did the kid with no arms or legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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One Direction has 12 letters. So does gayyyyyyyyyy. Coincidence? I think not.

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your skull would make a nice pen holder

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Whats black and blue and red all over? A housewife that was recently abused by her alcoholic wife. (from will c. and jack f.)

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whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Sunflowers are yellow And daisies can be a wide variety of colours.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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