Why did the fish fly It didn't

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What's black, white, black, white, black, white, and red? A horse with it's heard chopped off.

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Can I ask you a question? You just did

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Why wasn't Steve paying attention in class? Because he was dead.

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Fuzzy Wuzzy was a bear. Fuzzy Wuzzy had no hair Fuzzy Wuzzy died of cancer

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What do you call a cat in a piece of bred? An inbred cat.

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Q: Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants? A: Because he had bladder control problems and feared he may ruin the first pair.

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why did the chicken cross the road? Because there were no traffic.

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Kid 1 Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken. Kid 2 Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys. Kid 1 You know what? I think you're right Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get shrgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

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What did the polar bear say to the penguin? What are you doing here?

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911 jokes are just plane wrong

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the Crossing Guard union had reached a collective agreement and they had returned to work and it was safe to cross once again.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is a woman.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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A Korean, a Japanese, a Muslim, a Christian, a Jew, a Chinese and a member of Isis are enjoying a friendly game of poker. The Korean man kills everyone because he has a life threatening illness that prevents him from using his brain. The worst news though was that the he lost the game of poker.

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What do a plum and a small bunny have in common? There both purple except for the bunny.

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Stephen Hawking

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How did the blonde trip the brunette? She stuck out her foot

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Why was the little boy bald? Because he had leukaemia

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What's the difference between deer nuts and beer nuts? Beer nuts are $1.50 and deer nuts are under a buck.

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Roses are red Violets are blue There's always an Asian Better than you

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I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops