Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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What did the legless veteran get for christmas, The same grenade that blew up his legs.

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Hey i just raped you and this is crazy so delete my number and keep the baby

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Why is the country in a national deficit? Because the Illuminati want to control all human beings in a socialist new world order.

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i googled who gives a fuck my name wasn't in the results

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-Have you ever seen an elephant hidden behind a thread? -No. -How come you're seeing it, he's hidden.

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your mom is so fat.

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MR MR WHO?? MR MC CANN

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Your Mother

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Q: What does a baby and an old man have in common? A: They both pee in public

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What is black and white and red all over? A multi-racial orphan who has recently suffered a fatal stab wound to a major artery.

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Yup, I 100% agree with all the jokes that were made below this post. Chad's pretty gay.

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You haven't happened to see a cigarette truck around here have you? What's a truck?

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What is the meaning of life? Definitions of life on the Web: a characteristic state or mode of living; "social life"; "city life"; "real life" the experience of being alive; the course of human events and activities; "he could no longer cope with the complexities of life" the course of existence of an individual; the actions and events that occur in living; "he hoped for a new life in Australia"; "he wanted to live his own life without interference from others" animation: the condition of living or the state of being alive; "while there's life there's hope"; "life depends on many chemical and physical processes" the period during which something is functional (as between birth and death); "the battery had a short life"; "he lived a long and happy life" the period between birth and the present time; "I have known him all his life" the period from the present until death; "he appointed himself emperor for life" a living person; "his heroism saved a life" liveliness: animation and energy in action or expression; "it was a heavy play and the actors tried in vain to give life to it" living things collectively; "the oceans are teeming with life" the organic phenomenon that distinguishes living organisms from nonliving ones; "there is no life on the moon" biography: an account of the series of events making up a person's life a motive for living; "pottery was his life"

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A man walks into a bar and wakes up in the hospital with a mild concussion.

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Why did the man walk into a bar? Coz he felt like it.

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Mikey : I wan to divorce. Miney :are u funking crazy Mikey : no I'm funking dazy !

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how to you confuse a blonde you ask her to recit the alphahbet back words

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Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

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What's round, has two hands, and tells time? Some fat guy I know, with a watch.

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What did the doctor say to his patient? You have stage IV Ovarian Cancer.

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what do asians do in asian history month, nothing, it does not exist, hahaha

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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