Why are you bored? because fungus grows in your eyeballs so you try to stab it out but you end up blind and dead lol

Whats gay, has a nice ass, and can such a mad dick? Everyone at LNS, including me, Glenn. Just kidding I like bitches.

Why did the paraplegic roll his wheelchair up a steep hill? Because he's crippled.

Everytime God shuts a door, he opens a window... ...But I am the Goddamn locksmith!

noah is a scrub jungle

A duck walks into a bar and asks for a beer. The bartender realizing this is an odd situation, seeing that ducks cannot articulate the English language, realizes he must be dreaming. He wakes up and turns to tell his wife about the dream, but she won't respond. He then realizes how his marriage is in shambles...

How many freudians does it take to unscrew a light bulb? Two. One who unscrew the lightbulb and another who hold the penis....eehhh i mean ladder.

A couple arrive at a Halloween party for nudists. Then they enjoy the themed decor and food.

How did the hairless cat braid its hair? It didn't, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs.

The blond detective was searching a crime scene and replied to the police officer, "I smell something fishy about this situation." She was on her period as a matter of fact, and bled all over her trousers.

Today if my birthday, and I got given the Anti Joke Book! Happiness!

What did one lion say to the other lion? Nothing. There was no other lion. This particular lion had horrible social anxiety so he spent most of his time alone, eating buffalo poop and playing World of Warcraft thus further alienating himself from the other lions. He was a very lonely lion.

What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

Did you hear about the black man who went to college? He made a very successful living for himself despite this rough economy.

Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

roses are red violets are blue im much younger than i look;)

Why was the blonde confused? Because someone was dressed in a chicken costume throwing pinecones at her.

A black man, a jewish man and an asian man walk into a bar. They are attending the wake of a friend who died of cancer.

So A guy named Larry walks into a bar and says, Where is your couch?

Knock Knock Who's there? There's a peephole on your door why don't you go ahead and look

Yo mom as so dumb.... That she has a low IQ

What do you call a black person flying a plane? A pilot. Duh.

why did the chicken cross the road? because colonel sanders was chasing it with an axe

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...