A man with a magic watch says to a prostitute, "My magic watch says you are wearing any underwear." "YOU HAVE MAGIC WATCH?! Can it tell time too??!!!"

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Horse walks into a bar... Bartender says It's probably not a good idea that you're in here. You're a very large animal. Any sudden movements, you may injure somebody. I don't know why you're here. None of the glasses are ergonomically designed for you to drink from them. So, you should probably leave.

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What did the joke say to the antijoke? Nothing.

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How many unicorns does it take to change a light bulb? 17. 11 if its Tuesday.

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What's the difference between your jokes and your penis? No one laughs at your jokes.

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Everytime someone says Jamie on this website, he's referring to Dylan, cause he's to insecure to write jokes about anyone else. Please direct all jokes at Dylan Hodge, 14 years of age, living in Queensland, Australia, come to his house to watch the f a g man, suck his mothers p e n i s.

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The 70's called. They had the wrong number.

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Yo' mom is so fat, She should probably consider a low fat diet in which no more than 30% of the calories are from fat.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding a bomb that explodes in 3 seconds inside your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know, but it was delicious.

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A woman walks into a bar and asks for a duck. The bartender is confused, assumes the women has some sort of mental problem, and treats her nicely, as his sister suffers from Down's Syndrome.

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Why didn't the boy eat his soup? It was to hot.

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Whats big orange and likes to eat rocks? a big orange rock eater

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Holocaust jokes are in bad taste, Anne Frankly I won't have any of it.

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Two little boys are talking to each other: - My dad's dick is soo biig! - Eh, my dad's dick is small but it still hurts...

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How do you make a blond cry? Rape her and kill her family.

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what did the bannana say to the milk carton. nothing bannanas cant talk and their on the other side of the store

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Quarters look shiny, Brass beats Copper, Dish is better, So enjoy the hopper. DIrect TV, is forever alone. Kinda like you, when your on your phone!

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Two men and a woman go to lunch together at a restaurant in New York City. The first man says, "I'm glad that we're finally doing this." The second man says, "Yeah, me too." The woman concurs.

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being in an abusive relationship.

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Why is six afraid of seven? Because seven is a registered sex offender

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What would Hellen Keller say to Obama? Nothing she can't speak.

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Why did the black guy cross the road? His car was parked across the street.

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a boy walks into a hospital ward, and procedes to break down into tears because his family died

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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