Whats worse then a rainy day? Rape.

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CAOIMHIN. IVE BEEN DOING MY WORK SINCE IVE STARTED THIS CLASS. YOU'VE STARTED THIS WHOLE THING. I WROTE BIG MAC'S AND THATS IT. SO STFU

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What stinks of shit and has money. Smelly Mc Dee I lied about the money.

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A guy walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The guy didn't respond because he was deaf.

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why did the boring girl get ditched she was boring...

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What color do you get when you mix aquamarine with magenta? Transvestite.

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How do you kill a retard? Give him a knife and say "who's special?"

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Why does Mario grown on shrooms? Because they bloom inside of him.

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What do you call a fish with no I's Animal cruelty

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A man walks into a doctors office. The doctor says "I've got good news and bad news. Which do you want first?" The man responds "Let's have the good news." The doctor says "I ran a series of tests and found you have leukemia, but your insurance paid for everything." Shocked, the man asks "What's the bad news?" The doctor answers "Your company is switching to a private insurer and because of your pre-existing condition you're being denied coverage. None of your future treatments will be covered."

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How do you wake up lady gaga? First you simply whisper in her ear telling her to wake up. If she doesn't, simultaneously whisper and tap her gently. If you have failed to achieve your accomplished goal, repeat step two however intensely touch her and project your voice when telling her to wake up. Step three, get a... WAIT WAIT!! I just waisted 20 seconds of your life, you're never going to meet her.

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A stripper walks into a bar. She works there.

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why did the little girl throw a clock out of the window? because she wanted to see time fly

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Roses are red Violets are blue Im tired Cheese on toast

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Q: Why didn't johnny get any Christmas presents? A: Because he died in a house fire 3 years ago.

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Let me guess, you where really ready to Not not tell me that.

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When did Rick Santorum realize he was gay? When we woke up with a bloody condom in his ass.

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What's funny about 9/11. Nothing.

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what's worse than the holocaust? nothing.

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Knock knock. I have a doorbell...

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What did the sea say to the penguin? Nothing it just waved..

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Too bad, because UNTIL YOUR FUCKING "POWER OF HUMAN KIND" CAN SUMMON UP A FUCKING EYEBALL! NOTHING WILL MAKE UP FOR THIS SHIT! "Oh, my the good old phonebook, I will... Now... try... to... seduce... you... with... my... "goodness" As far as "oh I know where you live", well nobody here is hiding fagface! So you come out of your "darkness or shadows or whatever" and let me stab out both your fucking eyes! And we are STILL NOT GOOD! And yeah, have your faggots stop calling themselves Nero.

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Whats the difference between Obama and Hitler? One is the President of the United States The other is a fascist dictator that killed millions.

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Friends are just like trees. They fall down when you hit them multiple times with an axe.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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