Q. Why did Michael Jackson call Boys II Men? A. He thought it was a home delivery service.

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What is red and green and goes 50mph? A frog in a blender

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I saw a TV show last night. And it was good.

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What do a plum and a rabbit have in common? They are both purple except for the rabbit.

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In a nerd wedding they don't say "i do" They say "i accept the terms and conditions"

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How many babies can you fit in a blender? Depends how hard you push.

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Women don't have penises. Am I the only one who can't get over how WEIRD that is?!?!?

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a white guy, a black guy, and a latino guy all walk into a bar. The white man explains how his family is in turmoil because of his alcholism, the black guy shares his affection for crack, and the latino man explains why he shouldnt be here due to illegal immigration. They all hate their lives. Quack

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“Before I know it, he’s got both of my hands in his viselike grip above my head, and he’s pinning me to the wall using his lips … His other hand grabs my hair and yanks down, bringing my face up, and his lips are on mine … My tongue tentatively strokes his and joins his in a slow, erotic dance … His erection is against my belly.”

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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What's worst than finding a repeated joke on anti-joke? Finding a grammatical error on anti-joke.

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Q: What did the donkey say to the man? A: "Hello there, sir." it was later discovered the man was tripping on the hallucinogen LSD. Later on the man plummeted to his death after being convinced that he was a pterodactyl, and jumping off of a cliff.

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A: Did you know that cashews come from a fruit? B: Not really. This is an interesting fact. Any other facts you have? A: yes ("A" was lying)

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REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REDD REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED REED................................that is all LOL

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an average-looking woman walks into a bar. nobody really notices.

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Run, Run, As fast as you can, You can't catch me, I'm in a car.

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children are much like potatoes. when you eat them, they die.

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What is my name? I dont know

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face?" The horse's mother had terminal cancer

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If the goverment wants us to be eco friendly then why are the eco friendly cars so expensive?

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Why did Sally fall off the swing? Sally had no arms. Knock knock. Whose there? Not Sally.

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Women can vote? wtf

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Women's Rights

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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