Two polar bears were sitting in a bathtub. One said to the other, "Could you pass the saop?". The other say, "What do you think I am, a typewriter?".

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what did one computer say to the other .........

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What did you the blonde death amuptee child get for Christmas? Cancer.

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Person 1: have you ever seen Helen Kellers house? Person 2: No i havent Person 1: Neither did she

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It's Christmas in Iraq. Merry Christmas

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Did you hear the joke about Helen Keller? She's dead.

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A rooster lays an egg on the tip of a roof. Which side does it fall to? Roosters don't lay eggs

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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2 guys walk into a bar but the third one has known about what happens to the third guy but since he is reading this in a newspaper and his unaware of his surroundings he walks into the bar anyway and feels very foolish.

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Robin, get in the car!

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Confucius says... He with whom neither slander that gradually soaks into the mind, nor statements that startle like a wound in the flesh, are successful may be called intelligent indeed.

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Hey connor and brett its ben, you are both at my house

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What do you get when you jump into the Red Sea? Wet.

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What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? -a black man that left his family

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what's the difference between a duck? You can't wash a window with a brick.

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God Nero, Marry me now! I removed the nose thingie but it wont stop.

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What did the limp dick say to the vagina? Is that rash contagious?

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A 16 year old girl went into a bar. The police realized she did not have an ID, and arrested her.

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a child swallows a cleaning product, why is he given chocolate milk? to make him happy before he dies

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Why did the bald man lose his hair no not cancer obviously AIDS.

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What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

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Your in Thailand on a Elephant ride... at the end you jump off but uncle jack is still on the elephant and the elephant wont let him off.... Do you help your uncle, Jack off the elephant?

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Say you are caught in a net with 10 other people in said net at a construction site. A pair of scissors are right next to you and everyone said to use the scissors. But instead of using the scissors, you use your teeth in risk of a broken tooth.

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How much wood would a wood chuck chuck if a wood chuck could chuck wood? The woodchuck's ability to chuck has been left indeterminable. Therefore until the wood chuck's prowess in wood chucking is brought to light we must leave it a variable. Using the coefficient (L) to represent wood that can possibly be chucked. Then using (C) to represent the life cycle of said wood chuck chucking. We are also assuming this woodchuck will remain vigilante and not require food or sleep for the entire duration of chucking ultimately lowering is maximum chucking output. From this we can determine the W.C.P.S. (wood chucks per second). Finally subtract the remaining wood (RW) from the chucked total and we have rendered that : L(W.C.P.S) - (C -RM/t) = X

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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