why was little johnny laughing all day cactus

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TWO ROADS DIVERGED IN A WOOD

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Why did the man die a slow and painful death? Because he kept submitting stupid, recycled anti-jokes over and over; so, I killed him.

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Your mom is so fat, she had liposuction.

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How many Babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends how hard you throw them

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Why didnt the vampire have a reflection? You have to be real to have a reflexion

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How many jews can you fit in a car? As many as the compacity of the car can hold and how big the jews are

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What is more difficult than trying to get blood from a stone? Trying to teach it Japanese in the process. [L]

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Why does the Taliban forbid people from having sex standing up? It might lead to dancing. And then, of course, death.

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Justin Bieber tries to get into a club but is not allowed because he is to young.

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Yo mamas so poor, she should probably find a source of consistent payment to support herself.

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Q:Why was the frog sad A:He was stapeld to a boys face.

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Chuck Norris doesn't call the wrong number. He calls the right number.

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Why did Sally have a headache? She had a Brian tumor the size of an eggplant.

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There once was a plain Cheerio. He has a decent life with a low paying job and an apartment. One day, he decided to make his life more fun and started going to parties. He met some women and had a good time. He was happier and was soon promoted at work. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself, only to discover that he was now a Honey-nut Cheerio. He continued to go to parties and met a girl that eventually became his girlfriend. He became a manager at work and moved into an expensive condo. The next day, he woke up and tasted himself and was a Frosted Cheerio. He then quit his job and opened a club, where he became the most popular Cheerio in town. All guys wanted to be him, girls with him. At one party, his girlfriend asked him for some punch. He went to the kitchen but couldn't find any. There was no punch-line.

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How many Ringmasters does it take to change a lightbulb? None. They tell the clowns to do it

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What did the fridge say to the watermelon? Nothing.

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Q: How do you do to get an elephant down from a tree? A: Wait for the fall when the leaves start falling you shoot it down.

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Mike and Richard were walking down the street together Richard left because of Mike's garlic breath

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what does 1 out of 15 people get cancer

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Q:What does a black guy say when you steal his fried chicken right in front of him? A:"please restrain from taking food that does not belong to you. If you had kindly asked i would have kindly given you some, and right in front of me too! In all my life I've never seen such rudeness and i grew up in the Bronx."

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have Parkinsons, ;oshgfs;jgbRHG

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Q: Where did Sarah go when the bomb exploded? A: Everywhere.

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Q:What do you call a wizard who flies? A: A flying wizard.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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