Why did the chicken cross the road? What chicken? That one! Grandma, that's a hobo. Put your glasses on.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

A man was feeling sick and decided to go and see a doctor. He saw the doctor and then went home. He wasn't feeling any better so he decided to get checked-out by the doctor.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What does the homosexual arab who plays football who has a best friend called Dave enjoy doing? Playing football.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q:what does your face and this site have in common? A:both are poorly constructed

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when a leprechaun refuses to give you his pot of gold? He doesn't give you his gold.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What is worse than when the Titanic sunk? You Cannot say. You were on that ship.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What do you call a dog with no legs? It doesn't matter, it won't come anyways.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

person 1:hello person 2:hello person 1:do you want to hear a joke ? person 2:yes person 1:good bye person 2:good bye

thumb_up thumb_down +6

if you have 5 oranges and 15 ice cubes, how many pancakes can you fit on the roof? red, because aliens dont wear shirts.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

I walk into Tesco and wrestle an obese women for a packet of ''Mini's Biscuits''. This quarrel was over nothing but a trolley filled with them. I gradually became infuriated. Meanwhile, an employee commited suicide.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why are watermelons green? 9, because cows like to eat grass.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Q: What used to be black, and then became white, and touches young boys? A: Michael Jackson.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the kid with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What happens when you go from a jew to a penguin? A huge climate change.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

"Free to play" Play free "right now" "Free forever"

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was clumsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the toddler fall in the pool? He was irresponsibly left unattended outside and tripped on the edge of the pool. He died within two minutes and his parents were blamed for his death.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What did the Banana say to the Peach. Nothing, they are incapable of speaking because they are fruit.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Whats the difference between Osama and Obama? The S is replaced with a B.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

MAKE

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't. The chicken was ran over before it made it to the other side.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

What time is it when an elephant sits on your fence? Given the unlikely circumstance in which an elephant actually does sit on your fence, it is equally unlikely said elephant would be able to do so unseen by witnesses, of whom you may ask what time the event occurred. Assuming your witness thought to look at the time befor calling animal control.

thumb_up thumb_down +6

a red boat and a blue boat collided all the survivors still have nightmares to this day

thumb_up thumb_down +6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops