A dyslexic man walks into a bar. He orders a drink without making any grammatical errors.

How hot was the blonde considering she was in Africa for the first time and it was 103 degrees, very

the awkward moment when a fat person says they are fat

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

Why did the African cross the road? Because he was searching for his family after his village was massacred by rebel soldiers.

What did the farmer say to the duck? I don't know, but the duck doesn't give a f.....

what does lady gaga have that some people dont have? a penis.

Haikus are easy but some of them don't make sense but some of them do

Your momma's so old, she your family should be proud to know someone who has lived such a long and full life.

Why did Sally fall off her swing? -she had no arms knock knock whos there not Sally

What's hard, long and screws a blond? An IQ test.

What did the little boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Cancer.

Me: f*** off Asshole: YOU'RE MOM! Me: -is dead.

What did the Mexican man say to the black man? Hello, how are you today?

"Sticks and stones" the man said and shat on three different complex turtles

Why couldn't Gladice get out of bed? Because she was dead!

How do you kill half the Mexican population? through a penny of a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them its still down there.

Why was Timmy sad? While helping his dad hang Christmas light, he got tangled up in them and fell down. While falling he grabbed a wire, which caused a spark. This spark lit the house on fire. Since he broke most of the bones in his body from falling he could not run away. The house proceeded to collapse an poor Timmy seriously injuring and hideously disfiguring him. By the time the ambulance got there, Timmy was the only survivor for his parents died of smoke inhalation. Since he had no other living relatives he was forced to live in an orphanage for the rest of his childhood. That is why Timmy is sad.

Where is Sally hiding? She was kidnapped and has probably been murdered, I lied about her hiding.

What did one fat chick say to the other fat chick? Who cares, they're fat.

What did the boy with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Nothing, because he is an orphan.

What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

I heard you like getting dirty, so I got a dump truck to dump dirt on your bed so you can get dirty while you get dirty.

Why did the boy stay in the closet? Because the door was locked.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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