Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

Your mother's so ugly she has low self-esteem

Friends are like balloons.. If you stab them they die.

What do you call the offspring of a gerbil and a hamster? Whatever you want.

What do you do if a blonde throws a grenade at you? You die.

Why did the chicken cross the road? What does chicken mean?

what's the easiest way to tell time? a clock

What does an orange and a lemon have in common? They are both orange, exept lemon

Why did the boy get diagnosed with Cancer? I don't remember I have Alzheimers.

How do you make a dog drink? Put one in a blender.

Why did the little girl fall off the swing? Because she has no arms

What is both blue and yellow at the same time? Green.

"Knock knock!" "Who's there?" "A door to door salesman. Are you unsatisfied with the way your dish soap handles your plates? Then I have the product for you!" "I'm not interested in your product, but thank you anyway." "No problem. On an off note, how did you hear me? I didn't speak very loudly when I said knock knock, and I didn't even bother to knock on the door or ring the doorbell." "I have really good hearing." "Oh, okay. And for future reference, maybe you should open the door when talking to a visitor. Then body language gets established and the conversation flows more nicely that way." "That's some good advice, and I'll take it. Thanks, salesman." "You're welcome. On to the next house."

God wrote this joke.................................

What do you call a deer with no eyes? A shocking example of the cruelty suffered by animals at hands of humanity.

What do you call a horse that likes to box? A horse

so a guy walks into a bar, he says nothing for he now has a concusion

Why do people waste time reading these jokes. Because they like anti jokes.

Guest what? Dog

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing hide and seek with Dennis Ferguson

Why did the old lady talk to a tree? She had Alzheimer's and was going to die.

What's worse than a teacher yelling at you? The holocaust

What's worse than a joke. ONE TOLD BY FOK.

Why Bono always walk barefoot ? Because he's an asshole.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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