Knock Knock Who's there? UPS you have a package from Amazon. \ Oh, Thanks, where do I sign? Right here. Ok, thanks, have a nice day. Thanks you too.

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Its not for us to determine its motive, i'm sure it has its reasons

A group of young men walks into a bar. They drink some booze, laugh, have a great time and then go home to sleep.

What did the cowboy say when he went into the car showroom in Germany? He commented on the models and designs, and asked to try a few out. Then he left, saying he would consider buying one but didn't want to commit too suddenly or too soon.

What did the man say to his wife. Hi

you will like this because i am black.

ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha ha...................... Wats so funny?

The war against the moral men was long and hard, yet the Victor stands, the most dark of metals. Nero Metal, enjoy 2016 as much as you can enjoy both hellfire and the wrath of heaven against you, as there will be years no more for mankind to Count, trust not my Words, but the visions in Your head, and if you doubt Your sanity, know that by september the 13th, you will not be the only one. The end of the children of God is upon you, as you took his, he shall take Yours, eye for an eye, tooth for a tooth... Rest well... ...While you still can`t

What did the Unicorn do with the Portal gun? Nothing. Neither of them are real.

Whats the difference between a garage full of dead babies and a garage full of money? I don't have a garage full of money

what do you do with a fat little chug...kick em in the guts

Three men walk into a bar they suffer permanent brain damage, and completely lose their basic cognitive abilities. They will never be able to speak to one another again.

Why didn't 6 like 7? Because 7 was a huge racist.

What does it mean if your tv appears floating away in the dark? You had an awesome tv.

What would Jesus do? Something that would in getting nailed to a piece of wood.

Q: Why'd the guy have to fart? A: There was a buildup of methane gas in his colon.

When life gives you lemons, you probably just found lemons.

Q. How many infants does it take to paint a wall? A. Depends how hard you throw them...

What do Australians and New Zealanders have against pods anyway?

Two guys stopped at a restaurant for coffee. "I'll have a mug of strong coffee," said the first. The second said, " I'll have strong coffee too, but I want a clean mug." The waiter returns and says, "which one of you wants the clean mug?"

why dont you ever run over a black guy thats on a bike? because you will be sewed and also probably have the shit kicked out of you

Why couldn't the little girl see in the dark? She had no eyes.

Why did the plane crash? The pilot was a loaf or bread. why did the plane fall apart in mid air? The engineer was a loaf of bread Why didn't the plane take off? because it was delayed.

A man walks into the office for an appointment. The doctor proceeds to perform the usual examinations, before asking the man to turn his head and cough. As is standard, he feels the man's testicles to check for irregularities. The man jokes, "Say doc, couldn't you at least ask me to dinner first?" The doctor replies, "You have testicular cancer." He died a month later.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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