Comes a giraffe on a scooter to the hospital and asks: 'can I have some flour?'.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the midget say to the other midget? "We're midgets"

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Is this your pen? I wanna go to school, bye!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

why did the mans alarm clock go off at six am? he has a high paid job he doesnt want to let down.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What did the Polish man say to his doctor? "Witam, doktorze. By?em kaszel z ostatnich kilku tygodni i jest wysypka na moim lewym ramieniu. Czy jest co? co mo?na zrobi?, aby mi pomóc?" I don't know what it means, either.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What would kill a Muslim if they were to ingest it? Arsenic

thumb_up thumb_down -4

whats do dinosaurs and people have in common? one of them is extinct.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Whats worse than getting shot in the foot? Watching each member of your family get shot in the foot.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why did the black guy cross the road? Because he was late for a meeting

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Oh my god it's the twinkie mobile!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

There once was a man from Dundee, Whose Limericks ended on line three. I don't know why.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Sam murray got home after school one day, he siad hello to his father and possibly played some Avatar on the D.S

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What's the same about a duck-billed platypus and a duck? They both have a duck bill on their face... Duh!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q. Why didn't the man tell his girlfriend about his big lottery win? A. Because it was none of her business.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Nero, I mean it, I want you and your wife to have 15 million dollars, it wont buy you the happiness you seek, but it helps no?

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Lad: Whats that smell Girl: Nothing Lad: That is right nothing now get into the kitchen!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Q: Why was the cook put in jail. A: He has killed 2 people and robbed several stores

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Your mother is so fat that she has a very big butt and large breasts, which is quite attractive to some men, especially if they are open-minded.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

So a cat a dog are in a field.The dog then proceeds to eat the cat and take a nap

thumb_up thumb_down -4

one day a boy asked a Manican if it had a pulse it didn't

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Jesus: I will return. Hitler: Well I am back... Nazi as in Nazireth Bush: As I said I was elected by Gawd. Me: What? What about me? Seriously why did I put myself here? Id have three bullets with them in a room, and id still shoot you six times.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

How do you punish Helen Keller You don't, she's dead

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar and notices a twelve inch tall man playing a small piano. He asks the bartender about it. The bartender explains that the pianist has worked there for some time, mostly performing on weeknights. The bartender also tells the man that he may be suffering some vision problems, as the pianist is about 5'8" or 5'9". Some time later the man visits an optometrist and finds out he has a severe case of astigmatism. "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "Banana who?" "Knock Knock." "Who's there?" "Banana." "I already asked ''Banana who?'' Is that your real name? Who is this really?" "Knock Knock." "You are upsetting me. I am calling the police now. Please get off my property."

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops