Q: What did the kid say after he told a stupid joke? A: Well they banned me from Anti-Joke!!

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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What's the difference between a stepfather and a turkey? A stepfather is a man who married a woman who has already had a family with another man but the man does not mind because he has fallen deeply in love with her and wants to spend the rest of his life with the woman. A turkey is completely different in many respects.

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I have an excuse why one leg and one arm ar shorter than the ather two. I was born sideways and pulled out by an arm and a leg, trust me im not stupid or gay... ASSSSSSSSSSSHOLE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!..........................That was my turrets kickin in and i have dislexia if i didnt spell turrets right

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roses are red leather is black when god made you he was smoking crack

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Girl:Do you wanna hear a joke? Boy:Sure... Girl: jesus loves you

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A talent agency is giving auditions and is just about to rap it up when a family shows up. They reluctantly agree to their "brief" audition given that they had found no suitable talent that day. The routine starts with the father starting 6 chainsaws at once while simultaneously starting a juggling/lumberjacking routine. His beautiful wife proceeds to toss him additional chainsaws (as he continually throws them for dramatic effect) while also maintaining a hypnotizing dance which seems to drain your desire to leave from your very soul. The children take turns jumping in between the chainsaws while doing a silent replay of the movie, "Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon." After it plays out the father tosses the final chainsaw up in the air which lands standing straight, quivering in the dust of the studio. The studio manager says, "Why that's an AMAZING act!! I'll sign you right now! What do you call your act?" In response to which, the father shits on his desk.

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Why was the girl on the ground? She jumped off a bridge.

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Why can't Michael J. Fox draw a perfect circle? Because no one can draw a perfect circle

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Ask me if I'm a grapefruit. -Are u a grapefruit? NO!

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What does a black kid get for Christmas? Your bike

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what did the white man say to the mexican man when the mexican stepped in poop? you have poop on your toe

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am a florist.

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Where will you be in twenty years? Celebrating the twentieth anniversary of reading this question... unless you're older than 60, which by modern life expectancy, you'd be dead.

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Why couldn't the boy turn around in the hallway? Becasue he had a javelin through his head

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Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

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A Jewish man walks by a penny.

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Q: What did the crippled deaf kid get for Christmas? A: A motorised wheelchair and a cochlear implant. Good for him.

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did you hear the joke about the vagina ....... you'll never get it

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why is the black guy cross the rode. he did not' he got in a truck. i know it does not make s...

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A rock walks into a bar. The town goes into extreme panic and is abandoned because rocks are inanimate objects.

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A bear just broke into my house and im scared…...... Oh wait thats just my 350 pound teacher… now i'm even scareder

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it was really frogger in disguise

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why couldn't the blind man hear? because he was also deaf.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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