Why did the chicken cross the road? Because the KFC man was chasing him.

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A vegetarian walked into a butcher Luckily he realized where he was and walked out!

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A monkey walks into a bar. Monkeys are always funny.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The chicken just lost his job and has entered into a deep depression. He was going to commit suicide at the local KFC, but as he walked into the KFC, he saw a beautiful woman. They lived a full and happy life together until the chicken died of old age. Turns out the woman was blind, and partially deaf.

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What did one lawyer say to the other lawyer? I'm sleeping with your wife

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why did the girl with no arms or legs get for christmas? A wheelchair

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Three Men walk into a bar. One with a ax and one with a Shovel. The other one isn't holding anything. *Boom* (\ _ /) (x . x)

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What do you call a kid with no arms and an eyepatch? names.....

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Knock Knock Who's There? Peyton Peyton who? Peyton Manning

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A horse walks into a bar. Just kidding, it's a panda.

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What did the black do when a man robbed his house? He called 911

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How do you make an elephant float? Who cares?

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LO LLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOPLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOLLOLOLOLOLOLOLOOO O O O O O O OLO LOL OL O LO LO LO L OL

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What's the difference between a jew and pizza? A Jew is human and pizza is food.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swings? She had no arms Knock knock Who's there? Not Sarah

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Roses are red Violets are blue Most rhymes rhyme But this one doesnt

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have a gun! So I KILL YOU!!!!

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What happens when you mix mints with fizzy drinks Blast off

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What did the homeless guy get for Christmas ? Frostbite

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Why did Hitler kill six million Jews? Why not? --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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How did Helen Keller's parents punish her? They took away her Gameboy.

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Besides the kama-sutra, what is the most popular sex position in India? 68 and 88. Moral: Mutation people... mutation... use your imagination.., Still gotta feel a bit of envy/admiration, it is known as the happiest nation of the world, with a happiness rate with a constant well over 80 percent, and that is FAR over any other nation.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, it got hit by a bus on the way over.

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What did one penguin-necrophiliac say to another penguin-necrophiliac? Nothing. Penguins cant talk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops