goats are like mushrooms, if you shoot a duck, im scared of toasters

How did the guy who's been in his mothers basement for 20 years lose his virginity? He didn't, that's where his mother hid his body.

Knock knock Who's there? Mike Mike who? Mike Davis from across the street. Come in.

Why was 6 afraid of 7 ? Cuz he was black.

why did the black man jump higher than the white man he was on a trampoline

What did the Chinese man say to the other Chinese man? I don't know. I can't speak Chinese.

In Kentucky...your grandmother rapes you.

A train poops its pants.

A man walks into a bar so how many Jews were there when a man called Wellard ate a pizza. Balloons

Why did we invade Afghanistan? Because we hate arabs.

A man is hungry so he gets on his coat and shouts : "I AM GOING TO THE STORE!". His wife says not to because the police say the rapist 'Eggman' is out again. He says he will be very careful. On his way he hears 'They are the Eggmen, I am the Eggmen-" and the man shouts: "AND I AM THE WAlRUS, SO GET THE HECK OUTTA MY FACE OR I WILL KOO-KOO KOO-JOOB YOU AND YOUR CHILDREN!" The Eggman and the man found two more people from Liverpool and formed the band 'The Beatles'. The Eggman shot the Walrus in 1980 after the band broke up.

Why did the woman cross the road? Trick question, she didn't because she was in the kitchen.

CHORGLUND

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Q: How do you drown a black guy? A: Hold his head underwater and sit on his back.

Why couldn't the woman give her sister a present? Because she just got eaten by zombies.

How do you fit an elephant inside your car?: Starve it to death, then chop it in pieces.

what's purple and plastic purple plastic

Whats the difference between harry potter and the Jews? Harry potter could escape the chambers.

What do u call a woman geometry teacher. Santains wife.

How do you make an idiot in suspense?

It's good to be a scientist and great to be a biologist. However, it is never okay to be a scientologist.

why didnt the black guy die on the bus fire? The fire was in the front of the bus!

Q:Did you know Helen Keller had a tree house? A: Neither did she

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...