Why was the house on fire? A dog peed on it.

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Why was 6 afraid of 7. Because 7 was a terrorist

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What did the facial stylist charge Jack Sparrow to get his ears pierced? A buc-an-ear!

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Whats long and black? The line at KFC.

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How did the Mexican get into the united States of America? He was an american citizen, just of mexican descent.

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Q: Why did the man have aids? A: He had unprotected sex with a man who had aids.

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What do a rabbit and a plum have in common? -They're both purple except the rabbit.

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Why is Stevie Wonder always smiling? Because he has a great career and a loving family.

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Listen Erron, what`s wrong? I would have told you to go fuck yourself if it where not for the fact that AzureDragon just left for the cafeteria and is nowhere to be seen.

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What's worse than the holocaust? nothing it was a terrible act in history

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. I have PTSD. Time to kill myself.

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A man walks into a bar. He drinks heavily and dies of alcohol poisoning.

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What do you call 5000 dead lawyers at the bottom of the ocean? A tragedy almost unparalleled in marine history.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says, "Get out".

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how do you turn your dishwasher into a garbage disposal? make her take out the trash.

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OMG FUCKING NERDS WITH NO LIFE CAN READ ABOUT THE POWER OF YOUR Vaginal puss puss color, no but seriously, I kinda prefer unshaven, I mean if I change my opinion I just do it myself or command that you shave yourself while I put it on my cellphone while I jack off to you, making a creampie, yeah because.

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I do not want to know, you want to TELL ME so that I can increase the potency of the hypnotic suggestion by... Lets say... A number that if I said would work instantly? I wrote CONDOMS ARE FOR PUZZIES... Which kinda makes sense... Just a line, from the worst game ever.

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A nuclear reactor explodes and all the waste are going straight out in the ocean. I just bought a new xbox.

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Roses are red, violets are blue, I am white and I like cold food

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The early bird gets the worm. The rest of them die of starvation.

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Mom: what does IDK, LY, and TTYL mean? Son: I don't know, love you, and talk to you later. Mom: OK, I'll ask your sister.

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What can an elevator do that a mexican can't? Raise a family.

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Wolfjob.

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What do you do when you see an elephant with a basket ball? Engage in play - if the elephant is playing with a basket ball it is most likely domesticated, and if it has toys it's probably well treated. Well-treated elephants raised in captivity are tolerant, sociable, intelligent and playful.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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