The GOV and the WHO?

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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My milkshake brings all the boys to the yard. I guess I make a good milkshake.

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How do you get the icing in the middle of a cupcake? Cupcake raper...Duh

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

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Q:your jetski loses a wheel. how many pancakes does it take to fix your house? A:blue berry icecream.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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What did the muslim say when he boarded the plane? Where is my seat

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Roses are red violets are blue you better run I see you

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"Ask me if I'm a tree," "Are you a tree?" "No."

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What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

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Yo mama looks so much like a cardboard box, my kindergarten class graduated.

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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Doctor: I got bad news and worse news Patient: Whats the bad news? Doctor: You have 24 hours to live Patient: Whats the worse news? Doctor: Your mom died this morning

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What's red and smells like green paint? Red Paint

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What's the difference between a rhinoceros? I DIDN'T MURDER MY BROTHER OKAY!!!!!

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Several ways to annoy people: Grab the end of their shirt to blow your nose Try to shove a bowling ball down there throat Try to sell them a broom and vacuum Try to eat their babies paint their toe Nibble their ankles Ask if you can babysit their crystal and if they say no start whining Carry around your chicken and ask if they want a nugget

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Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

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Why did the mexican wash his car? The car was dirty

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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A man goes to the doctor and complains: "Doctor, my Viagra hasn't worn off! It's been over eight hours!" The doctor replies "You were bitten by a banana spider. You have one day to live.

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KARMA KARMA KARMA KARMA CHAMELEON

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops