Want a fight? You Spelt F**K wrong O.o

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Playing Jenga on September 11th.

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What happens when three drunk men are driving 80 miles off of a cliff. They all die on impact from the great fall and their family's mourn over their deaths for years to come.

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How many licks does it take to got to the Tootsie Roll center of a Tootsie Pop? 357

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There was a blond girl and a brunette girl. The brunette had a pink shirt that had " Abercrombie & Fitch" on it. The blond looks at the brunette and asks, where did you get your shirt?

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Why can't jesus hold skittles? They'd fall through his hands.

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Why did the chicken cross the roard? There were no cars in the immediate vacinity and the chicken therefore came to a logical conclusion that it was a rational theorem on which crossing the road could be based.

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knock! knock! Whos there? Chris Hansen..

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Why did the woman stop running? She was an escaped convict that had been on the run for twelve years and the police had finally found the place where she was hidding. Upon arriving at her house she started to open fire on the three police cars, hit two cops and killed one more. The two are fine and are going through physical therapy as they were both hit in the spine and have a difficult time performing the smallest task. The one was one called billy. Billy had died in the hospital after asking if they had got her. He died believing a lie. They never got her. She is still on the run, I lied about her stopping.

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A young man walks up and sits down at the bar. "What can I get you?" asks the bartender. "I want six shots of whisky," responds the young man. "Six shots? What’s the occasion?" asks the barman. "My first blowjob." "Well, in that case, let me give you a seventh on the house." To which the young man replies, "No offence sir, but if six shots won't get rid of the taste, nothing will."

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What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Haulocaust Whats worse that the Holocaust? Finding two worms in your apple.

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2 corpses are sitting on a bridge one fell down both are dead

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Why couldn't Timmy ride his bike? He didn't have a bike, his family was very poor and did have much money. Therefore a bike for Timmy was the last of their concerns.

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Why couldn't the black man play hockey in college? He died of cancer while still in high school.

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Bob: If two negatives make a positive, what would be an anti-anti-joke? Tim: An anti-joke

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My name's Dave, Microwave!

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We just got a letter We just got a letter We just got a letter I wonder who it's from Oh look, it's a letter from our friends If there is a place you got to go I am the one you need to know I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! If there is a place you got to get I can get you there I bet I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map! I'm the Map!

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A black man and a Mexican are in a car. Who's driving? The cop. The two men were best friends who had taken off from their law firm. Alex had recently gone through a divorce and John decided to take him on a trip backpacking across Europe. One rainy night an off-duty police officer picked them up and took them out for drinks. The friends had a wonderful trip. But Alex never got over Jenny leaving him. 3 months later John found him dead in his home by auto-erotic asphyxiation.

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Q: How many babies does it take to paint a house? A: babies lack the intelligence and motor skills to accomplish such a task so it is not practical to hire them for a painting job.

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How many Jehovah's Witnesses does it take to screw in a light bulb? 2. One to firmly hold the ladder and the other to cautiously screw it in. They are volunteering at the local orphanage and it is wrong to make fun of there religion. We are all different in our own special way.

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people say thers saftey in numbers, try telling that to 6 million jews

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How do you fit a giraffe into a refrigerator? You cut it into pieces.

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anti-joke.com

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What's big, yellow and if it fell from a tree it would kill you? A JCB!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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