What's it called when an abusive alcoholic father iguana has trouble connecting with his wayward teenage drug addict son iguana, while at the same time the mother iguana doesn't come home till late hours and constantly calls her daughter iguana a slut? Reptile Dysfunction.

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Why was Rebecca Black beaten with a pole when she sang Friday? It was Saturday

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What did the transvestite say to the hypochondriac? "Ever been to Toledo?"

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Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

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What's worse than finding a snake in your apple? Finding a snake in your apple

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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What did little John get for his birthday? No sort of disease or illness of any kind because he was in perfect health. He also got an Xbox.

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someone had sex with Justin bieber end result Justin went into labor

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Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I have altzeimer's, Cheese on toast

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B==========D-------------------------- im pissin man! god!

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Doctor, I keep believing I am stuck in the Matrix! Oh thats common, you know existencial crisis and so on but we got medications, you want the blue or the red pill?

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The doctor told a man he had aids. He told his friends he had AIDS so his friends wouldn't sleep with his wife after he died.

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Why do women love Panera Bread? They think it's healthy.

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Knock knock ? Who's there ? Ipe Ipe who ? You sick !

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What's the difference between Tiger Woods and Santa? Tiger woods is a famous golf player and Santa is a fictional old man dressed in red and white who is said to live in Lapland, have an airborne sleigh driven by eight magical reindeer and come down the chimney to fill childrens' stockings on Christmas eve.

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What do you call a muslim flying a plane? A pilot. WOW your racist!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because that's where the oncologist's office is.

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Who ate my sandwich? The office appliance that fell from the sky.

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What are the similarites between Autistic people and dead people? They are both very poor in social situations

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How do you keep someone in suspense? Refuse to let them view the resolultion of a gripping film.

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Thank you, you remind me that I am not insane, just because I believe we humans can accomplish more, by uniting as one, rather than fighting one another. I feel as if I belong somewhere else, yet the question remains always, are people such as you better, or are we relics from the past?

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a horse walks into a bar the bartender says "why such the long face?" the horse is now crying in tears because the bartender made him. by Brennan pickrell

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Q: How do you make a plumber sad? A: Kill his family

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops