Where does a successful black person live? Neverland.

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wh@t d0 y0u c@II @ d0g5sh£t w1th n0 sm£II? 0ID d0gsh£T

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Whats sad about a black man killing himself? That shaft DVD that he rented will probably be late now.

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Whats the difference between a black guy and Luke Skywalker? Luke met his real father

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Why did the blonde's parents take away her car? She didn't pay for half the insurance like she said she would.

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What did the cookie ask the glass of milk? Will you wash me down

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A sixty Year old man walks into a bank to rob it. He tells the bank teller, "Take the money and put it into a bag!" The teller told him, "Sir I don't have a bag." So the old man turns around and walks out.

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What's funnier than a chicken? nothing.

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A black man, an asian man, and white man walk into a bar. Not that out of the ordinary since America is a melting pot.

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Yeah, "master hypnotists" (and do not even get me started on hypnotherapists, they completely suck!) keep claiming that you need to keep up to date with the "constantly developing art of hypnosis" The thing is though, that hypnosis does not develop itself, people develop it further, and when the key ingredient is actually believing things under a certain state, you can do anything, even slow the passage of time to a halt. Once I tried that, I was disappointed when I figured out that it did not work, so I went shopping (for groceries), then realized that no time had passed at all, sounds like bullshit, and yeah I wont be trying that again anytime soon, lucid dreaming is good enough, you can spend hours and hours in a lucid dream state, days, and then wake up and figure out you slept like two hours or something.

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Q: What's worse than losing your job? A: Seeing your entire family die in a car accident

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are rather unintelligent animals which clearly underestimate the dangers of crossing a busy road.

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I was taking a major shiit in the bathroom stalls at the college and someone walked in on me, talk about awkward

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two muffins are sitting in an oven one muffin turns and says "boy it`s hot in here" the other muffin can`t bring himself to explain to the other they are about to be eaten alive.

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what is big, grey and sits in the middle of a field. A filing cabinet

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What did Hellen Keller say when she drove up to the stop sign? Nothing, she doesn't drive.

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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Bill: My vagina is itchy. Tom: You don't have a vagina. It was later found out that bill had a sex change and did have an itchy vagina, due to an STI. He later died of cancer.

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30cm = 0,3meters

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What is the oppisite of water? Dry!

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Once upon a time, there was a Y O U M A D and they all lived happily ever after.

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Curiosity killed the cat, Oh wait, I thought the dog did.

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You know what's funnier than a pile of dead babies? A pile where one's alive in the middle, and has to eat his way out.

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Your mom is so ugly, Ew.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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