Knock-Knock Who's there? A giant spider-like insect that lays eggs in your brain which turn into larvae that drop down onto your tongue and eat your teeth slowly, then form a cocoon and turn into the spider-like insect spoken of previously. You then wake up from this terrible nightmare and get ready for your well paying job.

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What do you get when you mix Lil Wayne and Lil John? A full size John Wayne

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Hey, I just met you And this is crazy This song doesn't rhyme PENIS

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A duck walks into a bar. The duck walks over to the bartender and orders a beer. "put it on my bill." he says. The bartender angrily grabs the duck and kicks him out of the bar, because the duck has done this many times, but has never once paid his bill to the bar. The duck is an alcoholic and is slowly ruining his relationship with his family.

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Humpty Dumpty sat on a wall Humpty Dumbty took a great fall Because he was terribly intoxicated And failed to probably balance himself.

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EVOLUTION OF MODERN SAYINGS 1 The Samurai: If at first you don't succeed, kill yourself. The British: If at first you don't succeed, give up The Americans: If at first you don't succeed, sue someone, then try again in hopes of a larger payout next time

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Why don't you ever stick your hand into the bottom of the jelly bean jar? Cuz' the black ones will steal your watch

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What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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here kitty kitty

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it does whatever the hell it wants to do!

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What's more sad then a dumpster full of dead babies? The live one at the bottom.

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why did a bunch of black kids play in a pile of leafs? to have fun :)

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Why didn't Susie do her reading homework? She is blind and her school system cannot Afford to teach her to read braille

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Warning: Legit Joke Below What is the difference between an elevator and a Mexican? Only one can raise a child.

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Q: what's wrong with this sentence? My dogs is running in the garden A: I don't have a garden

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What is worse than getting stung by 1,000 bees? Getting stung by 1,001 bees.

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What is the difference between a ginger and a pile of bricks? nothing. nothing at all.

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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where was Billy during the bomb? Every where

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27

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What did the murderer do to the dentist? Nothing, the murderer has served his time and is clean. But he did get his teeth cleaned.

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Why Didn't The Teenager Bring His Report Card Home to His Parents? Because He Was Murdered By Thugs Walking Home From School.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Its very nice.

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A duck walks up to a lemonade stand and says to the man running the stand. QUACK!!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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