What do you call a redneck virgin? A seven year old who can run faster than her brothers.

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Two men were standing on the 34th floor of a 65 floor building. They were trapped in a office with one window. here is their conversation: guy1: oh no what should we do??? guy2: I don't know!! this is awful!!! guy1: I have children and a loving wife!!! guy2 walks to the window sill and leans over. guy1: what are you doing? there is more to life we can get through this!! guy 2 jumps out the window guy 1 runs to the window sticks his head out and yells "MAKE MINE CHOCOLATE!!!"

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why did the koala fall out of the tree? because it was dead

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Why do all black men carry guns? They don't. That is a stereotype. Now pants on the other hand, that's a different story.

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Three guys walk into a bar: a Priest, a rapist, and a pedophile...and two other guys

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A man walks into a pole He breaks his nose And bleeds to death

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What do you call a dead baby in a lunchbox? It doesn't matter he won't hear you.

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What did Annie the Orphan get for Christmas? News that her parents are dead.

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Don't wake me up. If you wake me up then I will give you a puppy. Just wait until you fall in love with the puppy, because then i will kill it in front of you.

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Why did Susie fall off the swing? Because she has no arms. Why did the baby fall off the swing? Because i hit it with a bat.

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Whats worse than being out in the cold? Having cancer.

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Knock knock! Who's there? Your mother. Oh, hi Mom! Come in!

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Q: What's black, white, and red all over? A: A horribly maimed zebra.

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We start counting at 1, therefore 0 is countless. I've slept with countless women.

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what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to KFC and join his chicken friends to protest.

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How do you confuse a blonde? Beat her with a spatula while in a mankini with a dildo up your ass!

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an atheist and a christian meet in a bar they chat about football, order some pints, and have a really good night.

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What's the worst subject in school? None of them. You need school to get by in life. Get over it.

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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Why did the bones cross the street? They didn't. The dogs ate them.

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A blonde a brunette and a ginger jump off a cliff they die upon impact and their families mourn for years to come.

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Whats worse than a baby stapled to a tree? Holocaust

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Why couldn't the man stop dancing? Because he had Parkinson's.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops