What did the Mexican parents name their first born son? Nobody knows. He was adopted by a nice family due to the fact that his biological parents were murdered in cold blood. His foster parents named him Kevin.

how do you kill a blond? give her a gun and tell her it a blow dryer

Why did the Chicken cross the road Because he was not happy with his life at a chicken due to the fact take he was going to get eaten by a black man so he hoped that if he crossed the ride and got hit by a car and die he would regenerate into a poisonous frog

No, you would have made me unhappy and yourself miserable, until you truly value who you are, as we that still look up to you to this day, you wont see the greatness within you.

You're a big fat monkey.

knock knock whos there open open who the door

Three blind mice. See how they run. Into things.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because I hit her with an axe.

If I could slow down time I would have become a super criminal or something, no, my movements become slower also, ever heard of a game Max Payne? The character can slow down his perception of time and still aim his gun normally while he himself moving at the same speed as the rest. I well... when time seems to go slower, my thoughts do not, so yeaaah, Except my fast reactions also make me wear myself out faster to the point where I got injured a lot as a kid, like smacking my wrist against arcade games and stuff, broke my wrist, as a teen, still hurts when it rains, yeah weird but true.

Once upon a time a was born

What happened when rudolf bucked Santa? Santa ripped his hooves off and started hitting his nose until it stopped glowing

Q: Why was the man wet? A: I push him in a pool.

what happens when you throw a green rock into the red sea? -- it gets wet

This one time, at band camp, I played the trumpet.

"Doctor, Doctor, Help I feel like a pair of curtains" "I've got some cream for that".

What did the wife get her husband after they had intercourse? A sandwich, because she loved him and knew he was hungry.

Why was Osama Bin Laden so hard to find? His hiding place was difficult to come across.

Pretty vague, if I did not know you, Id conclude you where working for some mob syndicate or something.

How to confuse a dumbass: see next post.

Eight hours? Sigh, leave it to me then! We both know you are a sweetheart behind that thick skull of yours, I mean why would you ask if it bothers me then?

Man #1: What was the hardest part about watching that kid get hit by that bus? Man #2: My dick...

How do you make a dog hate you for the rest of its life? Steal its bone and beheaded it.

What do you call an Ethiopian with buck teeth? Lucky to have teeth.

I walk into a bar...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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