Why couldn't Kelly finish her test? She spontaneously combusted.

Roses are red violets are red bushes are red oh shit my garden is on fire

What is the difference between an anti-joke and a joke? The word anti before anti-joke.

Why did the black man die? Kidney Failure.

Your mamma used to be fat till Slim Fast came out with dick flavor!

Q. How did the blind man cross the road A. By an abmulance which took him to the hospital because his first attempt to cross was unsuccessful and the hospital was conventeintly located on the other side of the road.

Why did the chicken cross the road? Chickens have no sense of direction, he might have thought he was in wal-mart for all I care.

What happens when you cross a Mexican and a Chinese man? A multiracial man.

sometimes i put my hands on the floor tuck my head into my cheat and lean forward... because thats how i roll

A Native American walks into a casino. He wants to invest a protion of his earnings from his fortune 500 company into it because he believes it to be a profitable venture.

Why did the penguin die? It got eaten.

Hickory Dickory Dock. 2 mice ran up the clock. The clock struck one.. and the second one got away with major injuries, dying in a hospital three days later. The clock is now serving its 8th year in jail out of 25 years, and does not regret anything.

An Irishman, an Englishman, and a Scottishman walks into a bar. They had a good time.

What hurts more than a bee sting? Child birth.

Why did Paul let Johnny choke to death? Because Paul had no arms.

How do you rescue a fat girl that's stuck under a car? With a pickaxe and a donkey.

Did you hear about the dyslexic that choked on his own vimto?

Knock Knock Who's there A girl scout want to buy some cookies to raise money for my cardiac surgery?

Gorillas are black, Roses are red, Were out of milk, GET THE F**K OUT!

whats yellow and very big? I dont know. no one will tell me

There once was a man from Nantucket. He was a well respected member of the community.

If you are American when you walk into a bathroom and American when you walk back out, what are you when you are inside the bathroom? You're probably dispelling waste products from your body.

So there is a blind man... and he walks past a fish market and takes a deep breath and says"Oh boy it sure does smell like fish out here".

A duck flies into a bar. The bartender allows it to stay because it turns into a beautiful swan. The goose then lays a golden egg and the bartender stares in awe as a giant bean stalk grows out of the egg. He's ecstatic and really glad he let the flamingo stay with all the wonderful colors and magic going on.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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