Why did the maid clean the house? Because that's her job, ya moron.

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What did the man say when he found out he had cancer? Nothing. He was so in shock, that he later died from another type of cancer.

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What do you call putting a toad in the microwave? Animal cruelty.

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A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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A priest, a rabbi, and a Buddhist monk walk into a bar. A heated religious debate ensues in which everyone is uncomfortable and leaves questioning their own faith and fearing the unknown.

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How do you kill a blonde? The blonde you were planning on killing, Sarah, arrives home from a rather tiring run. She lets her hair down from her ponytail, and even though she is a little sweaty At the moment, you realize what a beautiful woman she really is. You decide to ask her to marry You, and after she says yes, you two make passionate love in the front seat Of your 2011 Cadillac Escalade.

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If April showers bring May flowers, what do May flowers bring? -Allergies.

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A black man walks into a KFC, he then realizes that he is in the wrong store, and walks out.

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I like my women like i like my coffee... with big titis

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what did the lion tell the jellyfish? nothing, both lions and jellyfishes cant talk, and even if they could the chances of a lion meeting a jellyfish are remote

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What do you call a mormon in a red jumpsuit covered in black spots? Proper terminology for this scenario has not been yet made

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What do you say to a girl with two black eyes? Nothing you've already told her twice.

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what did the man say to the doctor? how the hell would i know, ask him yourself.

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[] [] Those are eyes These are teeth

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how do you keep a monkey from stealing your banana? shoot it

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What do dogs call gaseous exchange? Woof!!

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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Why was the Pizza Delivery boy crying? He was sad.

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Hey I just met you you are a sneaker smell my gym socks and then pick oot throughyour nose

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An old lady at an atm told me to check her balance So i pushed her over

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What did the man say to the other man? I would have no clue because I am deaf

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If you're jumping rope, and both the tires are flat, how much frosting would it take cover the staircase? Rocket!

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Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

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The truth is he loves her!!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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