Roses are grey. Violets are grey. I am colorblind because Iam a dog.

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Why didn't Jacob marry Bella from Twilight? You have to be real to marry someone

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It's hard to tell, but i could really use a cigarette.

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Yo mama so ugly everybody died. The End.

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How many gays does it take to change a lightbulb? It's COMPLETELY circumstantial.

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What's cute and smokes? A cute person with a nicotine addiction.

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What's blue, white and red all over? Not a duck.

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Why did the road cross the chicken? Well, according to Einstein's Theory of Special Relativity, if you and the chicken were to cross the road simultaneously, your perspective, relative to the chicken, would remain unchanged. Therefore, the road would appear to move underneath the chicken, which would seem to be performing some style of polka dance.

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Roses are red violets are blue faces like yours belong in a zoo don't be mad I'll be there too not in a cage but laughing at you

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Where did the little boy go on vacation? His mother's funeral.

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So a train conductor is going at 70 mph to to a destination 50 miles away. He goes over 3 hills, one at 20 mph, the other 42 mph, and the last at 63 mph. he crosses 2 bridges at 47 mph each. What did the train conductors mom eat for dinner that night Nothing she had cancer and died.

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Whats the opposite of purple? Your adopted

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A man is walking down the beach and he spots an antique looking lamp in the sand, he picks it up and rubs it. Nothing happens and the man begins to cry realizing that his life is so dismal and pathetic he was ready to believe he had found a magic lamp. He proceeds to run into the water and bash himself senseless with a large rock until he passes out and drowns.

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A horse walks into a bar You have been reading so many anti jokes that you can actually anticipate the anti-joke punchline to this joke, because it is one of maybe 3 or 4.

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My mom says hi ............ Jk she says hello

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Why'd the asian man cross the road? I dont know, who cares? Just leave the guy alone

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Why didn't the oven turn on? Because nothing turned it on.

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Why did Michael Jackson get so many nose jobs? He was incredibly insecure.

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There were 50 koreans; half of them liked gangnam style but the other half didn't. Why didn't the other half like gangnam style? They were north koreans.

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I just lied when I clicked the 'I have read and agree to the Terms of Service' to post this when in fact, I didn't read it at all.

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Why did the woman shout at the bin? Because she is mentally ill

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Whats worse than cold feet? getting your feet chopped off.

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What you call it when 8 goes over 4? An improper fraction.

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What is the difference between a pizza and a Black guy? A pizza can serve a family of four.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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