What's the hardest part of eating a vegetable? The wheelchair.

whats the diffrents beetween a footballer and a hat nothing i lke chesse

Comedian: Do you all wanna hear a joke? Audience: Yeah!!! Comedian: Okay! What did the bad comedian say to the audience? Audience: What?!! Comedian: Chicken butt. Thank you, you've been a great crowd. Good night!

why did katy fall off her bike?

why did the dog cross the street? because it saw a squirrel

Roses are red, Violets are red, Tulips are red, Dandelions are red, I lit your garden on fire.

A man wakes up after a long night with a girl he recently met. He pulls out a cigarette, and looks for his lighter, but can not find it. He asks the girl if she has a lighter and she replies "There might be some matches in the top drawer of my dresser." He opens the top drawer and finds some matches.

How many raisins can you fit in a box? It depends on the size of the raisins and the box.

Yes!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yeah!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Yes!!!!!! Yes!!!

Why do you never see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it

How do you kill a squirrel? Take the jaws of life. Rip it in half. And suck on the organs.

Roses are red, violets are blue, I have to go to the bathroom.

Knock knock Who's there? The Land Lord The Land Lord who? I am here to evict you.

We're sorry, but something went wrong. We've been notified about this issue and we'll take a look at it shortly.

I love pissing people off :P

An Irishman walks into a bar. He died of alcohol poisoning that day

Why did the chicken cross the road? Who let the chickens out?!

Did you know that if you rearrange the letter in "Gill Lube", you can spell "Gullible"?

Why did the chicken cross the road? To commit suicide thus getting to the other side(hell/heaven)

Ok is 25 really funnier than 24 because i think 8008 or 5318008 are way funnire tahn 24 or 35 just saying

what did the crow say do the dead gazelle? - nothing the crow ate it

when you smile the whole world stops and stares for a while because you have one tooth and its half chipped.. and your a black mexican red head.

What's scarier than a ghost? Ur mum.

Yo mama so fat, her Patronus is a cake.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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