I'm on the seafood diet. A large proportion of my daily food intake is fish.

Why did the creeper not go home? Because his parents blew up. (As told by a 7 year old.)

How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

What did the penguin say to the fisherman? Nothing, they are different animals, and thus, unable to communicate.

What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient ability. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

A man walks into a bar. He says "ow."

a chicken crosses the street to ask a man: what is an anti-joke? the man replies: a joke the chicken responds: so why do they call it an ANTI-joke? the man answers: why did the horse walk into a bar? the chicken retorts: you can't answer a question with a question! the man replies: you're a figment of my imagination, nah nah nah nah i can't hear you.

you dint have to be a jew matt

What did the man before he was executed? Nothing. He was already executed before he said something.

Your mother is so fat that she will likely eventually develop diabetes.

A man walks into a bar. -Can I ask where am I? - he sais -Yes, you can. - sais the barman Awkward silence occurs. -Why aren't you asking? I said you can.

Why didn't the blonde hook up with the business man? Because he was a raging alcoholic and a severe smoker who was incapable of looking after his 3 kids and he has gone to jail 3 times for public nudity and beating his wife.

Q - What is worse than a nerdy joke on anti-jokes with a lot of big words in it? A - Although I get scared when i see big words, the page long jokes are probably worse

Making jokes about 9/11 is just plane wrong.

How many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop? 3, according to Mr. Owl

What do you call something that shoots out a white gooey liquid? A shampoo bottle

you know what? CHICKEN BUTT. butt of chicken ahahahaa

What did the coconut say to the lizard? Nothing, the coconut fell off the tree and killed the lizard.

How many Ethiopians can you fit in a car? Five in your standard sedan

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Q: What's worse than finding half a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Q: So what's worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? A: The punchline of this joke,

This is funny.

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. Then the man pays for the beer and drinks the beer.

why did no one like Ashley? because she was a bitch!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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